Call Ochocinco's Cereal For A Good Time

Senior Writer
10.01.10 5 Comments

Last month, Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chad Ochocinco launched his own brand of cereal, OchocincO’s, with the sole purpose of donating proceeds to the charity organization Feed the Children. By calling a toll-free number on the box, consumers could also make private donations to the organization to help their favorite NFL receiver’s cause. Only it turns out that the calls weren’t toll free and they were more like $2 for the first minute and .69 for each additional minute.

Instead of the 1-888 number for Feed the Children, boxes of the cereal featured a 1-800 number that led callers to a phone sex line. Best. Cereal. Ever. Boxes were pulled from store shelves yesterday, but in related news – people still call phone sex lines? Seriously? I haven’t called one since I was 16 and figured out that hotels didn’t block their lobby phones from toll calls. Not that I need to call, what with all the sex I have with live females.

So who is responsible for this mess and what are they wearing, WCPO Cincinnati:

Melissa Heher, the Vice President of PLB Sports said “Feed the Children” gave them the wrong number to print on the box and for now they will verify every phone number or web site they are given.

“It was not our intention to have that happen. Unfortunately for us, it did not work out for us… going to an adult site instead of the charity. We wanted to promote the charity,” said Heher.

Like this doesn’t promote the charity? I’ve never heard of Feed the Children before, but I’m sure as h-e-double-hockey-sticks that half of America will have heard of it by the end of today. You can’t ask for better publicity than this. Although, I am calling BS on the “We didn’t know” excuse. I called the 1-888 number for the charity and this is a transcript of my call:

Feed the Children representative: “Hello and thank you for calling Feed the Children. How may I help you today?”

Burnsy: “I wanted to make a donation to your charity.”

Rep: “Oh yeah? What kind of donation?”

Burnsy: “Cash, I suppose.”

Rep: “Mmmm, is it dirty cash? Tell me it’s been naughty cash.”

Burnsy: “I’m sorry?”

Rep: “You are sorry, you bad charitable boy. You sound hot, what are you wearing?”

Burnsy: “An adult diaper and Crocs… Jesus, mom, I’m on the phone!”

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