Coors Failed

Pro Wrestling Editor

A Coors Field grounds crew member learned difficult lessons about coordination and teamwork when he was overtaken by the tarp during Tuesday night’s Rockies/Mets rain delay and his crew just kept on jogging. The most surprising thing is that it was a grounds crew guy and not one of the actual Mets. The video tells you what you need to know, but the USA Today write-up is awesome, and features an AP beat writer morphing into E.B. White and going for the Newberry Medal for Blooper Reports.

The man tripped while helping to pull the tarp over the infield and was quickly smothered as the rest of the crew continued on. Once the tarp was flush, he crawled his way out to safety and smiled.

The crowd, which was retreating to the concourse as rain and lightning arrived in the bottom of the seventh inning, cheered as the man crawled out from under the white tarp like a mouse sneaking out from under the bed sheets.

The guy who copy and pasted the story over to HuffPo did an even worse job editorializing:

“Where’s Papa going to with that ax?” said Fern to her mother as they were setting the table for breakfast.

“Out to the hoghouse,” replied Mrs.Arable. “Some pigs were born last night.”

“I don’t see why he needs a ax,” continued Fern, who was only eight.

“Well,” said her mother, “one of the pigs is a runt. It’s very small and weak, and it will never amount to anything. So your father has decided to do away with it.”

“Do away with it?” shrieked Fern. “You mean kill it? Just because it’s smaller than the others?” Fern pushed a chair out of the way and ran outdoors. The grass was wet and the earth smelled of springtime. She slipped, and the other guys she was running with covered her in a big tarp.

You know, some days it just doesn’t pay to be a guy who covers dirt when it rains.

[USA Today]

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