No matter how many times I write “No way is this true” and “I refuse to believe it” and “I pictured it and now I can’t get an erection,” Madonna and Alex Rodriguez really do seem to be dating. And the stories from anonymous sources are only getting more sickening:
Sources close to the music superstar and the New York Yankees slugger claim Madonna is truly smitten by A-Rod, allegedly telling a close pal Rodriguez ”has the heart of a poet trapped inside an insanely gorgeous body.”
Rodriguez himself is said to be something of a romantic — penning not Madonna poems, but sweet, personal and rambling expressions of his feelings.
I get that from the ladies all the time. “The heart of a poet trapped inside an insanely gorgeous body.” Only the poet they’re talking about is Bukowski, and the insanely gorgeous body is Kate Moss’s.