The Healthiest Alcoholic Ever

07.29.10 8 years ago 8 Comments

Does combining your favorite thing in the world with your least favorite thing in the world make the thing you hate better, or the thing you love worse? One San Francisco man was willing to give us an answer when he did just that, combining the greatest thing in the world, drinking, with the worst, exercise. He drank 13 beers while running the 13 mile San Francisco Half Marathon at a rate of one beer per mile. And, as you can expect, adding the sauce to your morning jog doesn’t make it better.

I puked three times, blacked out for miles 11 and 12, and needed five hours to finish. This is my story.

–Exercising While Intoxicated via Uncoached

Best opening sentence ever. I’m always a fan of people who pioneer new ways to pound brews, but running’s painful enough sober. I’ll set the over/under at the number of times he fell down at 10.5.

Block quotes don’t do this article the justice it deserves, but you can find a full description of how the race turned out for the alcoholic athlete here. I also made the executive decision to put a video of beer drinking cats after the jump. It’s funny because they think they’re people.

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