Ladies and gentlemen, can I please have your attention. I’ve just been handed an urgent and horrifying news story. I need all of you to stop what you’re doing and listen.
The University of Nebraska-Omaha hockey team will introduce a taco cannon for home games next season. Bless their heart.
Taco Cannon sounds great, and we’re all super pumped about that. But let’s not kid ourselves, burrito cannon is a much better idea with much better logistics. It’s as if it was created specifically for a cannon. It’s rolled up all nice for you, and it’s ready to rock ‘n’ roll. No spillage, nothing. You don’t even need to package that thing in a wrapper. Slap that rolled up tortilla in the cannon and let it fly.