Vegan Sports News Update: Bacon at the Ballpark

Pro Wrestling Editor
05.24.11 4 Comments

Or as I like to call it, “Brandon Throwing Up at the Ballpark.” Tonight, the Class AA Richmond Flying Squirrels are featuring a Tribute to Bacon Night at The Diamond. The game will feature on-field bacon-themed promotions, a chance to enter to win a year-long supply of pork from the Virginia Pork Industry, and (believe it or not) participation from Kevin Bacon. Well, sort of. Squirrels Vice President and COO Todd “Parney” Parnell explains with the kind of carny panache I love in my Minor League Baseball.

“Kevin is a busy guy, so we’re thrilled that he was able to find time in his schedule to make an appearance on Tribute to Bacon Night … Having him here will definitely add some extra sizzle to a night we were already planning to ham up.”

The rub here is that the “Kevin Bacon” appearing at the game is a detective with the Chesterfield County Police Department who works with the Chesterfield Crime Solvers program and enjoys going to church, “as well as golfing.” He’s throwing out the first pitch and is signing autographs for some reason, but he’s not the same guy that invisible-raped Rhona Mitra, and he’s neither the guy was killed by Jason’s Mom nor the one condemned to stillness by John Lithgow.

His favorite movie titles featuring the actor, Kevin Bacon, include “Apollo 13,” “A Few Good Men,” and “Footloose.”

Wednesday night’s promotion is “Free Triple Bypass Night at the Ballpark,” with special guest Dr. Phil, but not that one.

[H/T Ballpark Digest]

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