God bless the Houston Texans.
We were perilously close to an unprecedented 0-5 performance in Week 1, when virtually everything went wrong. Deshaun Watson and company bailed us out from complete disaster but, with the on-brand work of overreactions around the league, Week 2’s slate is a lot more appetizing.
Before we get to this week’s NFL picks (including a pair of double-digit dogs!), let’s check in on where we are.
- Week 1: 1-4 (yikes)
- 2019 Season: 1-4
Come get these winners.
Arizona Cardinals (+13.5) over Baltimore Ravens
This line is preposterous. That doesn’t mean the Cardinals will cover but, on principle, you can’t convince me that the Ravens should be laying almost two touchdowns against anyone. Arizona might be bad but they aren’t Dolphins-level bad. Baltimore’s offense was a lot of fun and, in general, I am pro-Lamar Jackson as an NFL quarterback. The hype train is off the tracks, though, and the Cardinals are the only side.
Indianapolis Colts (+3) over Tennessee Titans
I believe in you, Jacoby Brissett. Well, at least I believe in you enough. The Colts have a roster that is underrated from an overall talent perspective and, even before they were (very) competitive against the Chargers in Week 1, I was buying low after the Andrew Luck retirement. In this case, it is even easier to take the Colts because, well, the Titans simply aren’t as good as they looked when dismantling the Browns in the opener. The AFC South gets exceptionally weird at times but the world is on the Titans and I just think the Colts are better. If you’re getting the full field goal, that’s enough.
New York Giants (+1.5) over Buffalo Bills
Count me as a skeptic of the Bills after Week 1. The majority of bettors will just see that Buffalo won last week and that the Giants were bad against the Cowboys. That leads me to getting some free points in this match-up and I’d take the Giants all the way down to pick’em. It doesn’t bring me joy to back Eli Manning but, hey, Josh Allen is on the other side.
Miami Dolphins (+19) over New England Patriots
Long-time readers had to know this was coming. The Dolphins are genuinely terrible. We knew that before Week 1 and the point was driven home with vigor. Still, Miami isn’t actually “lose by 49 to the Ravens” bad and this is the largest road favorite in the NFL since 2007. On principle, I absolutely have to take the Dolphins. I hate it, but it’s just the way it has to be.
Atlanta Falcons (+1.5) over Philadelphia Eagles
This line might keep climbing so it might be a good idea to wait and see if you can grab +2/+2.5 later in the weekend. Even at +1.5, I think the Falcons are the side after a swift overreaction to Week 1. Make no mistake, Atlanta was horrific against Minnesota in the opener and there is at least a small chance that Dan Quinn’s team is just flat-out bad. We’re going to need to see more for me to believe that, however, and this qualifies as a “kitchen sink” game for the Falcons playing at home in Week 2. The Eagles are better than the Falcons and I get that. Take the Falcons anyway.