Hank Azaria Offered Insight Into Which ‘Simpsons’ Character Is Going To Die

01.23.14 5 years ago 44 Comments

Back in October, after it was announced that Fox had renewed The Simpsons for an incredible 26th season, the show’s brass claimed that not only was a character going to die, but not even the voice actors knew who it would be. When the first episode of the new season premieres this fall, one character will indeed meet his or her end, and while people have been having a blast speculating and creating meaningless odds in an attempt to play psychic, only now do we have a crack in the case.

On tomorrow’s edition of Entertainment Weekly’s TV Editors Hour on Sirius XM 105 (noon ET for you satellite radio lovers) Hank Azaria will be chatting about The Simpsons and his AOL docuseries Fatherhood in a prerecorded segment, and of course the magazine couldn’t wait all week to spill the beans on what he admitted about this mysterious character death.

“I honestly didn’t know who it was going to be, and now I do know…I can say that it’s not one of mine,” said four-time Emmy winner Azaria…

That’s good news then for… *takes deep breath*

  • Apu Nahasapeemapetilon
  • Moe Szyslak
  • Chief Wiggum
  • Comic Book Guy
  • Lou
  • Carl Carlson
  • Dr. Nick
  • Snake Jailbird
  • Professor Frink
  • Kirk Van Houten
  • Luigi Risotto
  • Bumblebee Man
  • Captain Horatio McCallister
  • Superintendent Chalmers
  • Cletus Spuckler
  • Disco Stu
  • Duffman
  • Crazy Old Man
  • Drederick Tatum
  • Legs
  • Wiseguy
  • Akira
  • Doug
  • Johnny Tightlips

And many more that I’m missing, I’m sure. I don’t like to play favorites between Azaria, Harry Shearer and Dan Castellaneta, as they each cover so many of the show’s great characters, but I’m really relieved to know it’s not going to be Cletus and Disco Stu, specifically. I would, however, appreciate it if Castellaneta would let me know that Hans Moleman is going to be okay. A guy can take only so many footballs to the groin.

Or texting and driving accidents…

Or random Roomba attacks

Or pizza restaurant explosions

Or just being thrown out of a window like nobody gives a rat’s ass.

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