Johnny Weir And Tara Lipinski Will Work The 2014 Oscars Red Carpet. Kind Of.

The best parts of the 2014 Sochi Winter Olympics were, in order:

  1. The dreadlocked Swedish skier who shouted-out Wu-Tang.
  2. The terrifying giant nightmare stoner bear that served as mascot.
  3. Johnny Weir and Tara Lipinski covering figure skating in what appeared to be hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of wardrobe and jewelry.

So, given that third thing, I suppose this next blockquote makes sense (assuming, of course that the skier and the nightmare bear were unavailable):

[Weir and Lipinski] are leaving Sochi following their last show for NBC and heading to Los Angeles, where they’ll critique fashion at the Oscars for Access Hollywood.

“We already have people pulling clothes,” [Weir] told USA TODAY Sports on Saturday night. “We’re going to be ready. And we’re going to bring it.” [USA Today]

I want to see Johnny Weir and Joan Rivers verbally tear each others’ eyes out over, like, whether purple is a flattering color for Amy Adams. Give me this. Please.

The LA Times has a little more background on how the deal was struck so quickly. Turns out there’s one man to thank: Billy Bush.

The fashion-forward onetime Olympians will be posted in a tower position above the red carpet, where the program’s veteran host, Billy Bush, will be interviewing Academy Awards attendees. […]

As it turns out, Bush was the one who suggested the skating experts move their act from the ice rink to the red carpet. While conducting an interview with Weir in Russia, he suddenly had a stroke of inspiration, said Rob Silverstein, the entertainment show’s executive producer.

“He lit up and said, ‘You [and Tara] are doing Oscar red carpet for us,’” Silverstein said. “It hadn’t hit me yet, but as soon as Billy mentioned it, I thought it’d be great, so we made a deal with them in a day.”

Excellent. Terrific. Now all that’s left to do is tune in on Sunday night to hear Weir and Lipinski break everything down live from their fabulous tower in the sky, in real time, as celebrities step out of their limos and onto the Red Carpe-…

As with Bush, viewers won’t see Weir and Lipniski on Sunday; instead, they will appear in Monday’s two “Access” episodes, including segments taped at the Oscars.

Hold on. Taped segments? The following day? I still have to watch Seacrest?

This is bullsh*t.

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