Leslie Jones Swears Off Sex In Her Latest ‘SNL’ Rant

12.02.18 2 weeks ago 4 Comments

Weekend Update has been dominated by Pete Davidson for most of this season, and why not? He gets headlines, keeping SNL relevant. And besides, Davidson can really only play himself in self-deprecating confessionals, and that’s the only place those would fit. So it was a delight to see the return of one of the great Weekend Update monologuists: Leslie Jones.

Wearing a shirt with the word “sex” in a circle with a line running through it, Jones came to talk about how she’s sure she’s too old for casual hook-ups. “My sex days is over!” she shouted. “I’m 51. No one wants to have sex with an old b*tch.”

Jones said she peaked between the ages of 19 to 35, claiming her signature move involved her knees. Well, her knees are going, and so is the rest of her body. She can’t compete with the young. “You think I can twerk? I’m sitting on a hemorrhoid donut as we speak!”

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