Let’s Talk About Last Night’s ‘Happy Endings’: ‘Cazsh Dummy Spillionaires’

10.24.12 5 years ago 52 Comments

A lot of people have been comparing Happy Endings to Friends lately. This is a silly thing to do. Friends was a 90s cultural phenomenon that was very of its time, and it launched a number of notable careers. Happy Endings may eventually become something like that, but making the comparison right now is unfair, because outside of the fact that they are both shows about six attractive people who live in a large urban area, they are very different. For example, Happy Endings is fast, man.

My original plan for covering the show was to round up all the funny jokes and post a couple notable GIFs — and I am still going to try to do that — but by the time last night’s season premiere was over I had PAGES of notes. I really don’t think there’s a show on TV that rips out more jokes in a single 30-minute block. Archer, maybe? I don’t know, it would be close. One thing I do know, however, is that Friends wasn’t anywhere near this fast. That’s not to say one show is inherently better than the other, although Happy Endings is definitely more my cup of hot but not too hot tea, just that they’re different. This is what I’m getting at: You don’t always have to compare things to other things, people. You can just let them be the thing they are.

All right, enough rambling. On to the highlights:

  • Max’s pronunciation of Frasier (“Fray-zee-ur”) is the correct pronunciation from now on. Please make a note.
  • “Trust us, the last thing we want is for things to get complicated like in It’s Complicated, so we’re gonna just go with it in like Just Go With It and be friends with benefits like in No Strings Attached.”
  • The on-again, off-again, “keepin’ it cazsh like Franklin & Cazsh” couple thing is really hard for a show to pull off. I like the way they handled it in this episode, and I have a lot of trust in the people working on the show, but there’s only so much water in that well, you know? If I hadn’t literally just said not to compare this show to Friends, this is where I would tell you that I wanted a meteor to land on Ross and Rachel’s head. But I won’t say that, because that would make me a hypocrite.
  • “Yo mama so fat she died.” No joke: If the Happy Endings people put together a Sinbrad comedy album and released it online for $5 like Louis C.K., I would buy it. I really, really would. (Also, Jane’s little “I’ve been coming so hard… home from work” thing? It delights me that they got that passed the censors.)
  • If Brian Austin Green keeps making appearances on the show, I swear to God I will post the video of David Silver rapping. I won’t do it now, because this is the season premiere and I have other things to discuss, but I will do it one day. Mark my words.
  • “Let me slip into something a little more naked.” Between Eliza Coupe in the bathroom and Elisha Cuthbert in the bed, Happy Endings went and got sexy. This is most assuredly not a complaint. High five.

  • I want to be very clear about something: Please do not Misery me. Not even a little bit. I don’t care why or how (or, in Max and Penny’s case, for who) you would want to do it, just please do not. It does not seem very fun and I do not think I would like it.
  • “I’ll tell you what doesn’t count: the Miami Heat’s most recent NBA championship. It was an injury-plagued, strike-shortened season. Therefore, Lebron still needs six rings to even get in the conversation with Jordan.” Marry me RIGHT NOW, Jane. RIGHT. NOW. I will be your little mister wife.
  • Shoutout to Max and Penny for being best friends and loving each other and all that barf.

And finally, my favorite joke of the night:

  • “When I saw you with Karrisa today, it took everything in my tiny body not to slap the crunchy curl out of her hair and send her back to whatever monster truck back seat she was born in.” “What makes you think she was born in a monster truck?” “She said she was from Florida.”

Take us home, Sinbrad.

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