One of Family Guy‘s most revered repeat-gags are the epic battles between Peter and Ernie The Giant Chicken. An expired coupon led to a bitter rivalry that has seen the pair go at it several times throughout the show’s run. The overall winner of these scrums may seem obvious, but let’s examine each fight and rank them from least impressive to most.
5. The Fifth Fight – “Yug Ylimaf”
When Brian accidentally set time in reverse, we naturally saw a backwards chicken fight. In this particular battle, we don’t really have a clear “winner,” since there is no actual resolution to the fight, but I’m gonna give this one to the chicken, because he burns Peter with a blowtorch. And because he deserves to win at least once.
4. The First Fight – “Da Boom”
The original fight lasted only two minutes, much shorter than some of the battles we’d see later on. To Ernie the Chicken’s credit, he got some good pecks in. Ultimately, though, he was no match for Peter, who inexplicably found a way to run to another overpass to jump on the truck that was speeding away with Ernie before later slamming his head into a copier numerous times and riding him down to the pavement after falling out of a skyscraper.
3. The Second Fight – “Blind Ambition”
When the Giant Chicken returned for the second fight, the two had an epic street fight that led to multiple car accidents and several vehicles going up in flames. Eventually, the pair landed on a cruise ship, crushing a wealthy-seeming couple who were dissatisfied with their steak. Once again, the Ernie the Chicken went down swinging, and at one point, a series of blows managed to knock Peter into the bowels of the cruise ship. Unfortunately, Ernie then got chopped to bits (or nuggets, if you prefer) by the propeller of a helicopter. You could argue that the chicken actually outfought Peter in this one and that he only lost as the result of bad luck.
2. The Third Fight – “No Chris Left Behind”
This one is interesting because, for a moment, Peter and Ernie the Chicken join forces to take down an alligator, only to resume their latest slugfest after thwarting their opponent. And slug they did; on a train, and later on a tiny plane. About midway through, though, the pair realize that they can’t remember what they were originally fighting about (expired coupon, remember?) and decide to stop. Peter even has dinner with the chicken and his wife. Unfortunately, a dispute over the bill re-ignites the feud, and the pair go at each other with every cooking instrument they can.
1. The Fourth Fight – “Internal Affairs”
Easily the longest, most intricate fight of the series — this one goes on for five whole minutes! They also go back in time, visit a cloning lab, and go into space where they pummel each other in zero gravity. Finally, they crash onto an oil rig, where Peter once again manages to finish off the chicken. Really, I have no idea how he possibly could have survived this one.