Every ‘F*#k Off’ In Season One Of ‘Succession’: A Comprehensive Breakdown

Editor-at-Large
08.06.18

HBO

Succession, HBO’s new series about an aging media titan and his complicated relationship with his children, was many different things in its first season. It was a smart examination of power, both inside a family and in the world at large, that improved drastically as it progressed. It was a fun mix of comedy and drama, with the former thanks in large part to the relationship between Tom and Cousin Greg, the two main characters who are not members of the immediate family and who go about integrating themselves in opposite ways. It was a show that was kind of like Billions, both in subject matter (rich white people behaving like jerks) and in a few specific coincidences (ortolans, exploding rockets).

But mostly, it was a show about people telling each other to fuck off. My word, did characters on the show ever do that a lot. It happened so often that I started keeping count around episode four. Then I went back and counted them in the first few episodes. By the end of the season, I was obsessed. (I’m fine.) Let’s put it this way: Think of a number in your head that you would consider a normal amount of times for one character to tell another to eff off in one season of television. Now think of a number that you would consider a lot of times. And then, when you get to the end of this post, in which I catalog each instance of it with visual evidence and break down which characters delivered and received the most (again, I’m fine), see you close you got.

You can find in-depth analysis somewhere else today. We have important business to attend to.

Episode 1, “Celebration” — 4 F*ck offs

HBO

Delivered by: Cousin Greg
Delivered to: Assorted children
Notes: It is both perfect and hilarious that the first one of these comes from my sweet boy Greg, who delivers it — politely! — to a group of children before puking through the eyes off his mascot head.

HBO

Delivered by: Roman
Delivered to: His weird sage guy
Notes: Classic Roman.

HBO

Delivered by: Logan
Delivered to: Assorted paparazzi
Notes: Oh, oh this will not be the last we see of Logan Roy on this list. Not by a long shot.

HBO

Delivered by: Kendall
Delivered to: An inanimate bid
Notes: Things were good for Kendall. He had plans, dreams. Didn’t work out so much.

Episode 2, “Shit Show at the Fuck Factory” — 4 F*ck offs

HBO

Delivered by: Shiv
Delivered to: Kendall
Notes: Not all of these are completely deserved. Most of them are. This one definitely is.

HBO

Delivered by: Kendall
Delivered to: Tom
Notes: It’s crazy, back in episode two, Tom was a slimy climber and it felt good to watch people yell at him. By the end, he was still a slimy climber but in a crazy/adorable way. I love him now.

HBO

Delivered by: Roman
Delivered to: Cousin Greg
Notes: Leave Greg alone!

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Delivered by: Kendall
Delivered to: Gerri
Notes: This was delivered more as a “No way” or a “Come on” than an aggressive insult, but it still counts. Versatile phrase, this.

Episode 3, “Lifeboats” — 3 F*ck offs

HBO

Delivered by: Kendall
Delivered to: Mr. Polk from the bank
Notes: The beginning of Kendall’s fall. You need to be careful with casual profanity, man. In the right situation, comes across as a casual icebreaker. In the wrong situation, you offend the representative of the bank who holds the fate of your family business in his prude hands. I’ve seen it a million times.

HBO

Delivered by: Kendall
Delivered to: Roman
Notes: Kendall’s just flailing here.

HBO

Delivered by: Kendall
Delivered to: Stewy
Notes: Another non-aggressive one, delivered here in a sarcastic tone. Gee, I wonder where Kendall gets this from. Maybe a paternal figure with an affinity for the phrase. I guess we’ll never know or find out shortly!

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