12.02.09 8 years ago 28 Comments

Last night, after a harrowing “Sons of Anarchy” finale that introduced more problems than it resolved, I dialed up the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show on my DVR. You know, because it’s my job. Research. Yeah, research, that’s it. And I was surprised to learn that it wasn’t just a Black Eyed Peas-haunted runway show with overly elaborate lingerie costumes; there was also a reality show built into the hour that would determine a new Victoria’s Secret Angel.

And for those of you who missed the final showdown between Jamie Lee (pictured) and Kylie, SPOILER ALERT: Kylie won. Poor Jamie Lee. Once — just ONCE — I’d like to see a gorgeous blonde with huge boobs get a break in this country. (Video of both girls below.)

Oh, and while I’m on the subject, I’d like to put down in writing my F You to the ballyhooed Miraculous Bra. Oh, it increases your chest by two cup sizes? You know what that’s called, ladies? LYING. I guess I’ll just shove this cucumber down my pants and expect you to not be disappointed when we get naked.

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