FlipBoard
Lost/Cloverfield creator JJ Abrams’ Star Trek movie has a new trailer out, and once again I have to say that it looks surprisingly watchable. Plus, Bruce Greenwood is in it, and he’s like Jesus, but better. It’s weird, every time I see a trailer for this I think I’ll probably see it, but then I see posters of Spock at the theater and I want to run far, far away. Every time I look at this guy I hear Amber Alerts. Seriously, he’s creepy as f-ck. He looks like a condom with eyebrows.
But to get that unsexy image out of your head, know also that Diora Baird is also in this, and she’ll be playing “Orion Slave Girl.” That’s solid casting, because Diora Baird has magnificent tits. The tits of the future, really.
![[avatar]](https://profilecdn-woven.netdna-ssl.com/photo/257/profile)
If her tits are the future, I’m by a fucking DeLorean
Meanwhile, Queen Latifah will play an Ore-Ida Slave Girl.
If her tits are the future, I’m making a trilogy of ‘Bate To The Future movies. With my right hand as the lead role of “Shakey McFly”.
If her tits are the future, I’m milking them for everything they’re worth.
I knew a slave girl once. Her name was Harriet.
If her tits are the future, let me be the first to tell children to go fuck themselves.
Yes, her tits are the future.
*prints photo and heads for the bathroom*
In the Dominican Republic, when you hear the Amber Alert it means your child was buried under 200 metric tons of rubble in a mine disaster.
I’m going to start a silicone implant company and call it ‘Tits of the future’.
Twenty years ago, Joan Rivers told her plastic surgeon she wanted tits of the future. They’re now her ear lobes.
I went to “set my phaser to stun” but it had already fired.
Sulu thinks Diora needs a darker shade of green eyeliner, you know, ‘cuz she’s an autumn.
I’m off to my cryo-chamber, gentlemen. Wake me up when they’re here.
she needs some liquid dilithium crystals sprayed all over those puppies.
make it so.
If her tits are the future, “Hover Board” is the new “Motor Boat”.
New Spock looked at her tits, felt a stirring in his pants, and thought out loud, “This is not logical!”
if the borg get a hold of her it’ll be a gang bang, you know, cause they’re a collective.
Creepy as f-uck is turning Star trek into a coming of age film. Unless Yvonne Craig or her corpse is involved. That I can get behind.
If Diora Baird does a striptease aboard the Enterprise, does she wear spasties?
Since she’s an Orion Slave girl, she doesn’t get the whip if she misbehaves; she gets the belt.
If she’s an Orion slave girl, you know she’ll give you Crab Nebula.
New Hunky Up!
Bruce Greenwood is all about peace and love and does not approve of the new up.
Live long and perspire.
Set Nerd-ometer on “excited”
Anyone else getting a Starship Troopers meets Slumdog Millionaire vibe from this?