Senior Editor
05.18.09 21 Comments

The Paris Hilton documentary Paris, Not France (which takes its name from Hilton’s manager, who says when tweens hear “Paris” they think Hilton, not France) just released this three-minute teaser-trailer.  It proves that no amount of stylized title cards shouting “CELEBRITY”, “SCANDAL”, “HOLLYWOOD,” and “PAPARAZZI ASS DILDO PARTY” could make this bitch even the least bit interesting.  There’s no reason to watch the whole thing, unless you hate yourself, but Paris nicely sums up the entire project at the 25-second mark:

“People see me as… like… this Barbie with a perfect life… fantasy.  …Whatever.  …Maybe that’s what they like, I dunno?”

It’s like peeling back the layers of an onion, only when you get to the center, you get herpes.

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