At this point, we’re really starting to feel sorry for Chipotle. They need to understand that we’ve moved on. We’ve found fast-casual restaurants that understand our needs, that put important qualities like flavor and authenticity to the forefront, attributes that Chipotle just doesn’t have. Perhaps it’s because Chipotle was the first fast-casual restaurant that put an emphasis on quality ingredients, saving us from the food deserts created by the fast-food restaurants of yesteryear. But times have changed, the old standbys have leveled up, the new kids are making a push and… Chipotle, it’s not you. It’s us.
Things have been bad for the brand for a while now, but recently the restaurant even failed at giving away free cheese. When you can’t give away free cheese, something is wrong with the foundation of your whole company. They’ve tried getting us drunk, they’ve even tried making it so we can order through our phones and never have to shout “can I get more tortillas please?!” over spit-guard glass ever again. It’s just not working. But call us forgiving, call us stupid, we guess we’re watching how this next move turns out.
“Chorizo had a big following in its heyday, and a lot of our customers were disappointed when it was taken off the menu,” said Chris Brandt, chief marketing officer at Chipotle. “As part of our overall commitment to menu innovation and delivering the craveable food our customers love, we’re spicing things up and bringing chorizo back to our menu.”
The chorizo is prepared with a blend of pork and white-meat chicken and seasoned with paprika, cumin, and chipotle peppers. Sounds fancy, but we have a feeling the average market brand pork chorizo (loaded with lard that creates that guilt-inducing red grease) is where the real flavor is at. Still, people seem to be excited.
Chipotle, we’ll give you a chance. We’re here for it. But so help us, no red grease and it’s over.