As far as vacations go, there isn’t much further that you can run from your troubles and cares (that’s why we take vacations, right?) than the moon, a vast kingdom of desolation that has yet to be populated by chain restaurants and Club Meds that offer trapeze lessons in outer space. But that might all be about to change, thanks to the European Space Agency, which knows that in order for you to live your best life you should be able to enjoy a getaway at a “moon village, which is, yes, a literal village on the moon that has yet to be built. (Best news ever: there might be a pool.)
The Mirror reports that the flashy resort may be open to everyone–from tourists to miners to businesspeople just needing a different spot for a meeting–and, depending on where it’s built, vacationers could enjoy permanent daylight as they stare out into space from space. Permanent daylight, of course, is also something one can experience during certain times of the year in Norway, Alaska, and Russia, but Diva Plavalguna doesn’t perform there, so why bother going?
Of course, taking a trip to the moon–whenever that may be–doesn’t come without its own set of difficulties. While the idea sounds grawsome (which is what I like to say instead of using the words “great” and “awesome” separately), it’s also important to note that anyone enjoying the “moon village” will have to stay inside a controlled inside area if they want to don swim trunks or a bikini;
However, wearing a bikini is likely to be a no-no, because humans would need to don a space suit to avoid instant death on the freezing, airless lunar surface.
Currently, the base is likely to be constructed near the poles, offering access to water for drinking and possibly swimming – should ESA decide to fit the base with a pool.
I love how we just brush past the “instant death” part like it’s a clear and present danger in all vacation environments and go right to the swimming pools, but I guess the possibility of being deprived of oxygen/frozen is just the price you pay for a vacation most of your other friends won’t be taking/able to afford. Plus, by the time this thing’s built, they’re going to have to have lifeguards up there, right? Nothing to worry about!
Real quick:
ESA warned lunar tourists that they could face exposure to “solar radiation, micro meteorites and extreme temperatures” which would make their stay far, far worse than even the most miserable holiday in Benidorm.
Whatever, no big deal, moon fun!
While plans to build the resort are real, there’s currently no completion or opening date on the books. And though it sounds like a memorable vacation a poll of The Mirror’s readers suggests that no one’s holding their breath for the project to come to fruition anytime soon.
