Kid Rock Confirms He’s Not Running For U.S. Senate: ‘Are You F*cking Kidding Me?’

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Shhh. Do you hear that? That’s the sound of thousands and thousands of left-leaning Michigan residents letting out a huge sigh of relief. After months of toying around with vague allusions, near-declarations, and lengthy blog posts, Kid Rock has made it official: He’s not running for U.S. Senate.

Rock made the announcement, as any would-be Senator does, during an appearance on the Howard Stern Show this morning. He was absolutely unequivocal. “F*ck no I’m not running for Senate,” he told the host. “Are you f*cking kidding me? Who couldn’t figure that out?”

For a minute there, it looked like Kid Rock’s candidacy was the real deal. Back in July, the singer was insisting that his run was not a hoax and that he was actively looking into making this whole thing legitimate. “I’ve got 15 days from my announcement to file paperwork with the FEC!” he declared. “I have recently worked out a unique deal with BMG, Broken Bow, CAA and Live Nation to release music ON MY TERMS. Like politicians write books during their campaigns, I’m planning on putting out music during mine and IT ALL STARTS TONIGHT AT MIDNIGHT. It’s not a hoax, it’s a strategy and marketing 101!”

So there you have it. As many assumed — even his good buddy Ted Nugent — the entire thing was a publicity grab from the jump. But at least now you know about his upcoming album Sweet Southern Sugar, set to drop on November 3. All worth it right?