I don’t know what more can be said about the vast number of teasers for the shrouded-in-mystery season six of American Horror Story, but every time we post one of these things, it bears repeating that supposedly all but one of them are intentional misdirects. There have been plenty of theories of course, from a Charles Manson theme to something about a mist to some sort of colonial era Children of the Corn-esque alien thingamajig, although we still don’t know anything yet for sure.
None of that is important right now, though, because we need to talk about the latest teaser called “Bite Me,” which is number 23 if you’ve been counting. “Bite Me” is not even the first teaser or image so far to feature an arachnid, but I think we can all agree that this one is definitely the best one.
For anyone terrified of spiders, the appearance of the large, black and yellow spider scuttling around on screen is not the most welcome of sights. So as the spider turned and faced the camera, I braced myself for what would inevitably be the “jump out at you” moment.
I was not expecting to laugh out loud at this teaser, and I can almost certainly guarantee that it was not the reaction FX intended me to have, but here we are. And wait, does that spider have like, human teeth and a tongue under its fangs? Let’s see that again.
Nope, nothing in season six is gonna top this. That’s for sure.