When I think “Mickey Rourke burger,” I think a hearty back slap, a juicy high ball, and a slice of foul-mouthed straight talk, served on a gust of cigarette breath with a side of tiny dogs. As appetizing as that sounds, Burger King ignored all of it when creating their new Whiplash burger, based on Mickey Rourke’s drunken, parrot-berating character from Iron Man 2.
This limited-time addition to the BK® menu captures the sharp edge of the film’s villain, Whiplash, with an intense, red-hot flavor combination featuring a flame-broiled WHOPPER® sandwich topped with melted Pepper Jack cheese, crispy red peppers and spicy mayonnaise. The fiery sandwich will be available for a suggested price of $3.79 at participating restaurants throughout the four-week promotion.
I could see eating that, possibly for my late-night, Taco-Bell-inspired fourthmeal (thanks, Taco Bell, before it was just called “being a fat stoner”). But why only four weeks? What am I supposed when they discontinue the sandwich after I’m already hooked? Go back to eating regular Whoppers? Please, I’d rather lick a subway pole (no homo).
In the national adult television commercial, the King armors up with a futuristic “Iron Man” suit. In the spot, the “Iron King” introduces the latest technologies from the BURGER KING brand to the curious visitors at the Stark Expo. In his quest to deliver high-tech value with flame-fresh taste via another new great product, the Buck Double sandwich, he ends up wreaking havoc at the Expo.*
The Iron King sounds pretty sweet, so no complaints there. (He’s successfully privatized national deliciousness!) But I ask, would not a better commercial just be The King and Mickey Rourke makin’ it rain in a strip club?
*The press release comes from IESB, who wondered “Isn’t Mickey Rourke a vegetarian?” The answer is no (as far as I can tell). He did some commercials for PETA (below), but they were for neutering your dogs, not going veg. He also recently bought a cockatoo and named it “Elvis.” (Cue ‘More You Know’ music)
-Thanks to Zach for the tip