COMMENTS OF THE WEEK: THE GOODS ON DVD

Senior Editor
11.28.09 63 Comments

Howdy, folks.  This week I’ve got a copy of The Goods on DVD to give away.  I was going to write a full review of it, but suffice to say, it doesn’t quite hang together as a whole movie, but it has some big laughs.  It’s just about what you want out of a DVD, actually.  Anyway, Donkey Hodey and ChinoMoreno won last week so I’m disqualifying them from this prize, but I will say they probably deserved it for these:

[From New clip from Avatar] Donkey Hodey says: Anybody else think how funny it would have been if when he jumped over that waterfall that he would have landed on some shallow rocks and paralyzed his avatar too?

[From Fantastic Mr. Fox clip: a beaver gets pounded] ChinoMoreno says: Wow. Straight to the pounding. He should have started by giving the beaver the finger.

And:

ChinoMoreno says: The beaver was impressed by this pounding until the neighborhood ‘coon hit it. The beaver never went back.

Now that we’ve basked in their hilarity, this week’s DVD winner is…

Jacktion! says: Fantastic Mr. Fox: Beaver getting pounded :: New Moon: Pussy getting neglected.

Well done, Jacktion!.  Sorry for saying Chino’s and Donk’s were funnier, but you know how I love a good coon joke and wishing someone was paralyzed.  Honorable mentions:

[From More pictures from The Hangover credits] ChinoMoreno says: 
I once got caught giving a BJ in an elevator. I had to take the stares.

[From Studio wanted O.J. Simpson for the first Terminator] Donkey Hodey says: I’ll be black.

Michelle07 says: “I’m a running back.”

[From Fantastic Mr. Fox clip/beaver gets pounded] Erswi says: Do beavers with Teeth build dental dams?

spazmodic says: Whenever I try to give a beaver wood, she lodges a complaint.

[From Clip from Funny People] [Editor’s note: I have no idea what the context of this was, or whether there was any] Burnsy says: This is precisely why I beat off in a girl’s hair once she passes out.

ChinoMoreno says:
This is precisely why my hair is so shiny and silky smooth.

[From Robert Pattinson to remake Hangin’ With Leo/ “Robsessed”] Chino Moreno says: I’d rather see him do a remake of Hangin with David Carradine.

Donkey Hodey says: Meanwhile, the documentary about his fans will be called ‘Robese’.

Burnsy says: 
He should cast his agent in Robstraining Order.

[From Pete Hammond’s writing was meant for Comic Sans] Påüłÿ Ðąηgęrσűşľγ says: Every comment I write is written in Underwear Sans.

[From Everyone hates Old Dogs except Pete Hammond] Donkey Hodey says: 
I want to rub Pete Hammond’s nose in his review.

[From no real context necessary] JHC says: 
I hate it when Cantaloupes are all like, “Why don’t you ever pay attention to my needs?” and the Honeydews just act like have better things to do. 
F-ckin’ Melondrama is the worst.

ChinoMoreno says: 
Those melons need to spend some quality time together so they can work through their differences and come together as a team. The place to do that? John Cougar Melon Camp.

[From the trailer for Babies] Jacktion! says: This movie is so loud that I just want to shake it until it shuts up.

…Yeah.  That seems like a fitting place to end this post.

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