FlipBoard
Den of Geek has put together an amazing list of movie titles that were re-titled for distribution in foreign markets. I’m a little pissed they didn’t include The Pacifier, which was re-titled Gnome in the Phillipines. Still waiting for an explanation on that one. In any case, here is the Chinese portion of their list:
The Full Monty: Six Naked Pigs
The Blair Witch Project: Night In The Cramped Forest
As Good As It Gets: Mr Cat Poop
Boogie Nights: His Great Device Makes Him Famous (Genius. Just genius)
Leon: This Hit Man Is Not as Cold as He Thought
Fargo: Mysterious Murder in Snowy Cream
Austin Powers: Trump Card Big Liar
Deep Impact: Earth And Comet Collide
Knocked Up: One Night, Big Belly
Nixon: The Big Liar
Risky Business: Just Send Him To University Unqualified
Free Willy: A Very Powerful Whale Runs To Heaven
There are plenty more from other countries over at Den of Geek, but for whatever reason, the Chinese titles are by far the best. My hypothesis is that it’s because the Chinese are batshit crazy. Also: Mr. Cat Poop was my nickname in high school. [Thanks to Israeli FilmDrunkard Ohad for the tip]
![[avatar]](https://profilecdn-woven.netdna-ssl.com/photo/257/profile)
They forgot: “Twilight” = Fat Girl, Wet Panties
“Ace Ventura Jr.” = You No Wantee To See This Movie
“Herbie, Fully Loaded” = Rindsay Rohan’s Big Bleasts
Dirty Harry: Inspector Harry
ROFLKOTAL!
Being John Malkovich: The Hole Of Malkovich
Japan totally copyright infringed on my porn movie.
Indian Jones Four = Lucas Shits in Eyes of the Legions
Indiana Jones Four = Lucas Shits in Eyes of the Legions
Last one for today:
“Made for Each Other” = No Tickee? You Luckee!
Mr Cat Poop is Stephanie Meyers husbands nickname
Indiana Jones Four = Lucas Shits in Eyes of the Legions.
Airplane: The Unbelievable Trip In A Wacky Aeroplane or The Incredible Journey In A Crazy Airplane
Uberwhakenplannen?
Meet the Spartans = Biological Terrorism
I tried real hard to hold my wind while watching The Horse Whisperer, but ended up clearing the theater.
K9: My Partner with the cold Snout
The Parent Trap: A Twin Seldom Comes Alone
Dodgeball: Full Of The Nuts
Germany totally copyright infringed on my porn movies, too.
E.T. = Down’s boy and glow chest pederast
Iron Man: Al’s Vibrator
Cop and a Half: Smokey and the Bandit
Tropic Thunder: Amos and Andy go to War
LOTR = Midget Ring Dance for Hemorrhoid Eye Stalk
Hannah Montana Movie: Happy Alone time for creepy older man
Big Mama’s House: Black Man is Fat Woman
Big Mama’s House 2: Same Ting
Big Mama’s House 3: Same Ting
Big Mama’s House 4: Same Ting
Hancock = Negro Flies
Wall-e = Cube Shit Robot and Anal Egg
Love Guru = Fuck You from America
The Predator: Whoopi Golderg on The View
Dark Knight= Corpse in Makeup
Field of Dreams: Historic Corn Sister Fucking
*pours a little sizzurp out for Fek*
Soulplane: Black People Allowed On Planes
The Producers = Gender Confused Man and Horse Fucker
Driving Miss Daisy: Chocolate Freckled Chauffeur
Charlie’s Angels: Chinese Goddess and ugly friends beat people up.
Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon = Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon
See, that shit title didn’t make any sense, now you know why.
Clerks: You Buy Something, You Go Now!
New up
Aimless Leon: Portman Ogler.
I remember seeing As Good as It Gets when I was in Hong Kong. The “Cat Poop” basically means he’s an asshole. So Mr. Asshole, which is a pretty good title for most Jack Nicholson movies
Oooh, “Mysterious Murder in Snowy Cream.” I saw that. It was a remake of Clue using bukkake…