Never Say Never, the new Justin Bieber biopic, or whatever you want to call this plan to steal your pre-pubescent daughter’s panties, has a new trailer out, and the timing is perfect. Phew, NOW I have something to be thankful for. Anyway, I guess the point of this one is to really sell you on the 3D aspect. But am I reading too much into things, or is anyone else a little creeped out by the implications of targeting little girls using Justin Bieber shooting silly string and throwing buckets of popcorn at the camera?
“Never Say Never! In 3D! Come pay fifteen bucks for Justin Bieber to shoot his silly string right on your daughter’s face! He’ll be practically dumping buckets of greasy popcorn all over her face and hair! The 3D is so vivid, she’ll leave the theater with the taste of salt in her mouth!”
“He’s 16, and he’s doing it all on his own,” …says Usher, while J-Biebz is flying across the stage in a harness at an awards show, while starring in a 3D movie about his life optioned by Disney…
So, uh… is this… level of bullsh*t just acceptable now? We’re all just going to pretend these words bear some relation to English?