FlipBoardWhen Peter Berg signed on for Battleship, it meant Dreamworks had to find someone else to direct Real Steel. They chose Night at the Museum director Shawn Levy for the project, which can basically be described as When Rocky Met Robot Jox.
The “Steel” story line takes place in a near future where human boxing has been outlawed, and heavy, humanoid robots slug it out in the ring instead. Into this world step a father and his estranged teenage son, who train an extraordinary fighter.
I can hear the pitch now: “See, it’s like Iron Man meets Terminator meets Fight Club, with a dash of f’ck it, let’s say Transformers.” And keep in mind this isn’t a Japanese direct-to-DVD flick, it’s being produced by Steven Spielberg and Robert Zemeckis. Now, please hold for a truly awful PR quote…
“Steven’s passion for this project was absolutely infectious and I’m so excited to bring this story to life,” Levy said. “In a movie filled with these mechanical warriors, at its core ‘Real Steel’ is an incredibly human story.”
WOOOF. Please tell me he didn’t actually say that. That was created with an automated, mad-lib PR-quote generator, right? “In a _____ filled with _______s, at its core, _________ is an incredibly _______ story.” Try it out some time. In a BATHTUB filled with MEXICANs, at its core, THE READER is an incredibly LESBIAN story. Works for anything, really.
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Robot Jox is possibly the best-worst, post-apocalytic, futuristic humanoid boxing/fighting movie since Arena.
Man, I need to sleep instead of watching pay cable until 4 in the morning.
Robot Mike Tyson thinks plugging in means raping.
BattleBots wants it’s 1999 back.
If this is about Chief Knock-a-Homer, I’m on board.
When I saw the headline, Robot Jox was the first thing that popped into my mind. The second was why did they call it “Robot Jox?” It sounds like an athletic supporter for robots.
It says some thing about todays society that say when robots were first thought up it was as servants or helpers. These days all we want from our robots is massive fights. Screw the washing up lets just get them to beat shit out of each other.
And people will wonder why robots will rebel.
The only robot box I’m interested in seeing is Summer Glau’s…and Rosie the Robot.
In a bowl filled with nachos, at its core, Brett Ratner’s Life is an incredibly tasty story.”
-Harry Knowled, AICN
A KO’d robot shows either the Red Ring of Death or the Blue Screen of Death, depending on which corner is his.
Why do you even have to train robot boxers? Wouldn’t you just program them?
Uh, Robot Jox looks awesome. Shoulda’ layed off the solvents in the early nineties.
In a tank filled with sharks, at its core, danny matherson’s death is an incredibly heart warming story.
In a movie filled with robot odd couples, at its core, H4R0LD and MOD is an incredibly creepy geriatric robot sex story.
In a fly ass world filled with gangsta ass robots, at its core, Ro-Pop n’ Lox is an incredibly dope story.
-Ben Lyons
Working title: Cinderella Can
In a crawlspace filled with dead tranny hookers, at its core, “Vince’s Apartment” is an incredibly Filmdrunky story.
In a very stupid country filled with idiots willing to pay for the lowest common denominator, at its core, Reel Steel is an incredibly fitting story.
The first rule of Robot Fight Club is 0101010101.
The second rule of Robot Fight Club is 0101010101!!
At Peet: does Cinderella Can star Russel Crobot?
(sorry couldn’t help myself)
*Remains in corner*
Yo, Patty
Please message me at filmdrunkards@hotmail.com
In an Econoline 300 filled with children, at it’s core, my life is an incredibly neverending story ?
Seltzer and Freiberg are mad that Vince stole their title for a spoof movie about robot boxing.
Rock ’em & Sock ’em is what I’d do to Anthony Kiedis’ weiner.
*air guitar*
Fuck Vince, did you go and have to give them an idea for Mad Libs: The Movie?
Really?
Mike Dyson versus DustBuster Douglas was an epic match.
The only way to end a Robot Boxing match is with a Technical Knockout.
Fuck you, the Roomba means that I can treat all vacuum cleaners as robots.
Besides, Floyd Maytagweather fights in a different weight class and Oscar De La HVAC is retired.
…or maybe Raging Dell…
The bad robot’s name is IKEA Drago.
“I must insert fist A into face B.”
“He is not robot, he is like a piece of Iron”
-“You’re carbon steel you idiot, you’re stronger than iron!”
…Million Dollar Beeper?
…hello..?
Everybody remembers the fight between Sony Liston and Muhammad Audi, right?
I just realized I don’t even have to make a pun for a George Foreman boxer…
Porn version… Real Doll Steel… In a world where human female mud wrestling has been outlawed, and robotic Real Dolls rule the planet, estranged lesbian twin sisters train an extra horny Real Doll, Betty Blue Balls, to mud wrestle. The final climactic scene pits Betty against Roxanne, the mighty champion with Sybian like power and endurance.
The first rule of Iron Man meets Terminator meets Fight Club is to not talk about Iron Man meets Terminator meets Fight Club.
Robot Jox sounds like the cyborg answer to Teen Wolf.