Senior Editor
03.02.10 17 Comments

Fox takes a novel approach to picking projects: they lay hundreds of scripts on the ground and have the CEO put his forehead on a bat and spin around until he’s dizzy, and then try to run to the far end.  Whichever script he trips over, that’s the movie they make, and everyone barks like seals.

Martin Lawrence is returning to his signature comedy [!] franchise ‘Big Momma’s House,” and will be joined by Brandon T. Jackson [at least it’s not Nick Cannon].  In the latest adventure, FBI Agent Malcolm Turner and his 17-year-old nephew, Trent, go undercover at an all-girls performing arts school after Trent witnesses a murder.  Posing as Big Momma and Charmaine, they must find the murderer before he finds them.  Insiders say the filmmakers don’t want the threequel to be titled “Big Momma’s House 3.” [Variety]

I like how Variety uses threequel as if it’s a real word. Anyway, I’m pretty sure I can predict how this will go down: Martin Lawrence slips on a banana peel and breaks his high heel.  As he tries to hide the run in his pantyhose, he turns to Brandon T. Jackson in drag and says, “I’m too old for this sh-t.”  Enter the WB frog, they all soft shoe out of frame, aaaand scene.

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