Senior Editor
07.15.09 18 Comments

The 12 years since Wings went off the year have been like a bad dream full of emptiness and pain.  But finally, according to Variety, the cast is reuniting to bring the story of the wacky Hackett Brothers to the big screen!  Hold on, I’m reading something…

Disney has acquired screen rights to the young adult novel “Wings” and will develop the bestselling Aprilynne Pike title as a star vehicle for Miley Cyrus.  Pic will be developed for Cyrus to play Laurel, a 15-year-old who grows up sheltered and home-schooled in a small town. Adjusting to a big high school is difficult, and her suspicion that she’s not like the other kids becomes a reality when she sprouts a pair of wings and learns that she’s a fairy. Published in May, the novel is the first of a planned four-book series. [Variety]

Aw, crap.  Another false alarm.  Maybe you’ll eat next month, Steven Weber.  Also: I always wonder if the fact that all redneck chicks dye their hair blonde now was influenced by Disney’s lazy ass plot devices.  Ten bucks says this movie will start with Miley Cyrus will be getting pushed around in the cafeteria, then they’ll throw a blonde wig on her, and Holy sh*t, she’s a fairy princess!

PS: “Aprilynne”?  F-ck off.

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