It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia is blasting through season 13 and just dropped a “clip show” in full absurdist Sunny fashion. There was a killer Frank wig and a full-on flashback to Seinfeld. It was, of course, a glorious display of madness.
That episode gave us an idea. It was high time we did a little reminiscing about one of the best and longest-running comedies. We took a slightly different path and pulled our absolute favorite (and sometimes disturbing) food scenes from the 13 season run of the show.
A quick note before we dive in: This is about food, not drinks. There are so so many amazing drinking moments from It’s Always Sunny that we may have to come back for another round. Until then, enjoy these food moments that Demonstrate Value in all the right ways.
“Chimichanga, you are delicious.” — Season Seven, Frank’s Pretty Woman
The introduction of Fat Mac was a delightful departure from the usual semi-swole self-proclaimed bouncer/bodyguard. The reveal comes at the beginning of season seven and finds Dennis truly concerned about his roommate’s health.
Even after Fat Mac finds out he has type two “dia-beetus,” he doesn’t give into a healthier way of life. In fact, he leads Dennis into his world of gluttony and sloth (and back to crack) with a literal trash bag full of chimichangas. And, let’s face it, we all long for a trash bag full of deep-fried burritos every now and then.
Frank’s Sausage Pocket — Season Five, Mac and Charlie Write a Movie
Frank’s greasy fingers ruin Dennis’ plan to be the greatest screenwriter of all time. This occurs because Frank discovers that his shirt pocket is the perfect place to store fried breakfast sausages, of course.
When those hunger pangs hit, sausages are right there and the shirt does “all the work.” Also, Dennis should have known better than to write a screenplay on a “new” touchscreen smartphone.
Trash Cake — Season Nine, The Gang Broke Dee
Season nine opens with Sweet Dee at rock bottom. The gang finds her smoking a cigarette, swigging from a cheap whiskey flask, and eating Frank’s one-month old cake that Charlie (Charlie!) threw away.
Dee’s life is stalled and her dreams are slipping away. There’s only trash cake and bad whiskey to comfort her. We’ve all been there, Sweet Dee… We’ve all been there.
The Italian Market — Season Five, The Gang Hits the Road
In season five we learn that Charlie has never eaten a pear or a strawberry. Mac takes it upon himself to remedy that ridiculousness immediately and barters for a pear — saving a whole 15 cents.
Charlie is not impressed and, in the time it takes Mac to complain, Charlie has somehow eaten the entire pear: Core, stem, sticker, and all. Mac is, of course, baffled, most of all by Charlie eating the stickers. To which Charlie simply replies, “I eat the stickers all the time, dude!”
The Cheese Cart — Season Eight, Charlie and Dee Find Love
Charlie Kelly’s cheese obsession is well-noted throughout the entire run of the series. To be fair, cheese is amazing, so we get it. The greatest cheese moment for Charlie has to be him being tempted by the cheese cart while on a double date.
A cart rolls up and Charlie can’t contain himself for more than a few seconds. He straight dives in face first to the pile of cheese cubes and starts noshing. We’ve all dreamt of doing exactly that at least once. Right? Right???
Fight Milk — Season Eight, Frank’s Back in Business
Okay, we know we said no drinks in this list but Fight Milk is more a supplement/protein shake that’s super high in “crowteen.” The mix of milk, crow’s eggs, and vodka is the “first alcoholic, milk-based protein drink for bodyguards by bodyguards!”
Luckily, the recipe on this one’s pretty simple if you want to try it home. That is, if you can source crow’s eggs. Please don’t source crow’s eggs. Maybe just throw in a chicken egg.
Grilled Charlie — Season Two, The Gang Goes Jihad
The Grilled Charlie is the perfect amalgamation of Charlie Kelly’s childlike wonder and adult-life stark reality. The grilled sandwich — which should be made in a skillet but can be made on the radiator in a pinch — is a mix of Wonder Bread, American cheese, chocolate syrup, peanut butter, and butter.
The Charlie method is what makes this one special with the cheese and peanut butter going on the outside of the bread and the chocolate syrup and butter going on the inside because, well, of course.
Oddly enough, it doesn’t sound that bad.
Grilled Frank — Season Ten, Frank Retires
Once Frank retires, Charlie takes it upon himself to “take care of” Frank. So Charlie whips up a special Grilled Frank sandwich with all the foods Frank loves.
This culinary counterpoint to the Grilled Charlie is basically a pancake with jelly that’s been cooked with a whole stick of butter with bacon, sausage, and spam layered in between the pancakes. It’s sounds like a heart attack on a plate and we’re here for it.
“I ate all the pizza and drank all the beer.” — Season Four, Mac’s Banging the Waitress
Mac did a bad thing and started sleeping with Charlie’s crush/stalkee, The Waitress. Charlie suspects and draws Mac out by wanting to hang out, drink beer, and eat pizza.
Mac comes home late to find a suspicious Charlie having drunk all 24 beers and ate the entire pizza. He’s a soggy drunk mess of course. We get a nice string of crazy drunk Charlie babbling, making the whole thing is worth it. Plus, we’ve all probably killed a pizza after too much beer with a side of depression at least once. So, we get it, Charlie.
Guigino’s Italian Restaurant — Season Eight, The Gang Dines Out
Guigino’s Italian Restaurant is one of the finest restaurants in all of Philadelphia. It’s where the gang goes when they want to celebrate a win or just live the high life for a night. It’s where Dennis and Dee find out that Frank isn’t their biological father. It’s where Charlie tries to date.
It’s also where the whole gang nearly falls apart after pairing off but then all showing up at the same place (Dee is, of course, dining solo). Naturally, staring contests ensue. Sly manipulations break the gang’s cool. Recriminations are tossed between tables. In true Sunny fashion, mayhem ensues and food flies.
Frank Eats a Crow — Season Six, The Gang Gets Stranded in the Woods
In a rare episode away from Paddy’s and Philly, the gang find themselves stranded on the way to Atlantic City. While Dennis and Charlie have a great ol’ hoot in AC, Dee, Mac, and Frank remain stranded in the woods of New Jersey.
Starving, they come across a dead crow and a fluffy rabbit. Dee takes a liking to the rabbit and they decide to give the crow a funeral. The trio settle into the car for the night.
The next morning, Frank wakes up in terrible pain. Why? You know why.
“I feel like a cobb salad…” — Season Five, The Waitress Is Getting Married
Hey, remember when Artemis and Frank were a couple for a hot minute back in season five? Yeah, that was a very weird relationship that only got weirder in ways that only It’s Always Sunny can pull off.
One of the high watermarks was when Frank and Artemis were going full 9 and 1/2 Weeks at the fridge in front of everyone in Dee’s apartment. Frank then asks his daughter for bacon bits so Artemis can put them in her hair while they “bang.” It makes her feel like a Cobb salad and is, according to Artemis, “amazing.”
Eating Dragon — Season Ten, The Gang Goes on Family Fight
When the gang goes on a Family Feud knockoff — with the great Keegan-Michael Key guest starring as host — things go awry as per usual. The best part is when host Grant Anderson (great game show host name, btw) asks Charlie to name an animal that we eat but doesn’t eat us. With all the confidence in the world, Charlie answers, “Dragon!”
We don’t know if there’s ever been a better answer to that question. Dragon truly is the meal of kings.
Rum Ham — Season Seven, The Gang Goes to the Jersey Shore
Rum ham is an easy inclusion here. Fat Mac and Frank find their own good time by going all in on the whole “Jersey Shore” vibe. They rock out on a yacht, take copious shots of bright colored booze, and fall in love with rum ham — the ham soaked in rum.
Admittedly, rum ham has been recreated quite a bit but to no edible avail. Still, the idea of a ham getting you drunk while nourishing you is a dream we wish were real.
Orgy Buffet — Season Four, Mac and Charlie Die (Part 1)
Of course an orgy needs a buffet. And, of course, Frank makes a beeline for the buffet as soon as he and Dennis arrive at a sketchy, masked orgy.
There’s a huge tray of both mac and cheese and fried chicken. We’re totally down for that combo at any buffet. Dennis points out that the orgy really is just a “half-nude buffet party.” Which, sure, but there’s fried chicken and mac and cheese in chaffing trays, so who cares?! What’s the password? We’re in.
Milk Steak — Season Five, The Waitress is Getting Married
Milk steak is another classic that has become a massive meme over the years. It all started when Mac and Dennis decide to help Charlie move past The Waitress by getting him onto an online dating website.
About five seconds into sitting down with Charlie to create a profile, everything spirals out of control once milk steak is mentioned. The rest, as they say, is meme history.
Cottage Cheese — Season Ten, The Gang Goes on Family Fight
The Gang Goes on Family Fight is already on the list, but damned if it doesn’t have another iconic Charlie moment with cheese.
Charlie’s bewilderment by an “enticing bowl of white” is a thing of beauty given his deep love of cheese. Since Charlie isn’t a “cottage guy,” the creamy cheese curds seem to have slipped past him all these years unnoticed, much like pears and strawberries.
Spaghetti Day — Season Six, Charlie Kelly: King of the Rats
“What is your Spaghetti Policy here?” That phrase should be in rotation pretty much everywhere you go. It’s good to know where you can and cannot eat a nice tray, bag, or bowl of spaghetti, especially if it’s Spaghetti Day.
What’s that? Spaghetti Day is only kind of a real thing? We have to remedy that immediately. Our two cents, every day can be Spaghetti Day — spa optional.
Thanksgiving Dinner — Season Nine, The Gang Squashes Their Beefs
This episode takes the idea of a family Thanksgiving and twists it through the lens of the gang’s very eclectic family and shall we call them “friends.”
Basically, the gang wants to get a fresh slate with all their aggrieved and, often, batshit crazy associates over a big family Thanksgiving feast. Naturally, fur flies and a fire eventually breaks out. The gang then seals everyone into Mac and Dennis’ apartment and simply walks away. It’s one of the darkest moments in the show. But, as Dennis points out, there is a fire escape.
So, um, yeah, Happy Thanksgiving, everyone…?
Mac’s Famous Mac and Cheese — Season Eleven, Mac & Dennis Move to the Suburbs
When Mac and Dennis move to the suburbs, life seems swell. Mac takes on the mantle of the stay-at-home-dad while Dennis takes on the commute into Philly everyday. The two city dwellers start to fall apart immediately.
A wonderfully dark five-part noir plays out around dinner every night as Mac serves Mac’s Famous Mac and Cheese. And when we say “dark,” we mean it. Things spiral out into a War of the Roses level of villainy until Mac’s secret is revealed. We’ll never look at a humble bowl of mac and cheese the same way again.