Listen, is it too much to ask for both truth in advertising and to get as much of the coffee part of iced coffee as your jittery, caffeine-addled self needs? Those are just two of the truckload of questions at the heart of a lawsuit against Starbucks filed by an Illinois coffee lover who claims that there’s too much ice in her massive cup. The cost to the mega-chain should it go down in defeat? A cool $5 million.
You see, the aggrieved party is arguing that the venti, Starbucks’s largest size, is supposed to contain 24 ounces of liquid. Given the fact that “large pieces of ice take up more space,” she’s getting just 14 ounces. So instead of kindly asking her barista for less ice and more coffee, she’s suing the company for $5 million. Because dammit, what are we as both humans and brands if our word actually weighs 10 fewer ounces than it’s supposed to?
Starbucks, for its part, isn’t having any of it. According to a statement, their “customers understand and expect that ice is an essential component of any ‘iced’ beverage.” They also added that yes, any beverage will be remade lickity split should a customer feel unsatisfied with it.
Still, if you love coffee — like really, really love it, to the point that it may be flowing side by side with the blood in your veins — you might sympathize with the person doing the suing here. Right? Nothing should ever come between a coffee-lover and their fix.