All The 2017 Grammys Performances, Ranked

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All told the Grammys turned in a pretty respectable night last night. The performances ranged from the mind-melting theatrics of Beyonce to the largely forgettable duet between Lukas Graham and Kelsea Ballerini, but no one was outright bad and the show was largely enjoyable overall. You can’t go around spouting off mild and vague positivity on the internet, though. Ours is a land where nothing makes sense until it’s been broken down, categorized and ranked. So with that in mind, here’s a rundown of the best performances of last night’s ceremony, starting with the “meh” and going on to the performances everyone will be discussing for at least the next week.

Check it out below:

16. Lukas Graham and Kelsea Ballerini – “Peter Pan” and “7 Years”

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This mash-up performance — side note: we’re still doing those? — failed to be memorable, through no fault of Kelsea Ballerini’s. Lukas Graham’s “7 Years” racked up plenty of nominations, but that doesn’t stop it from being bland aural wallpaper and a cartoonishly cynical grab for the same backwards-reaching Millennials who made the 21 Pilots’ superior “Stressed Out” a mega-hit. So, it’s fair that more people will be talking about that group’s acceptance speech than will remember this performance. We all owe this great country upstart an apology.

15. The Weeknd and Daft Punk – “I Feel It Coming”

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Who knew cocaine could be so boring?

The Weeknd’s performance of “I Feel It Coming” was aided by a laser light show and Daft Punk but it left our decidedly less-addled minds as soon as the performance was over. Maybe they should have played “Starboy” instead of going for the fake out?

14. Adele – “Hello”

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