Laettner aboard a Polish naval vessel. Not pictured: solar-powered flashlight” title=”Laettner aboard a Polish naval vessel. Not pictured: solar-powered flashlight” class=”alignright size-full wp-image-41″ />
As noted elsewhere this weekend, former NBA player and lone Dream Team scrub Christian Laettner was elected to the prestigious National Polish-American Sports Hall of Fame. The induction banquet is in Troy, Michigan on June 12th, where attendees will be served pierogies and copious amounts of Old Style.
"Laettner" might not seem like a Polish name, but the board decided that he'd swallowed enough of Mike Krzyzewski's vowel-deprived DNA to qualify as Polish-American. Oh, and don't worry about my false allegations of gay sex amongst the Duke basketball team — Laettner never left his apartment without a handful of spicy condoms.
In order to make his bust for the museum, Laettner's head and shoulders will be lowered into a vat of molten bronze. The resulting statue will be placed next to other sporting greats of Polish descent, such as the guy who invented ice hockey cleats.