Eat Your Heart Out, Waylon Smithers

Senior Writer
12.27.10 2 Comments

El Perro de la Langosta dice, "Caramba! Ese un hombre con la muneta!"

In news that’s a few weeks old and should have never happened, grown men from across Venezuela gathered in the country’s capital city, Caracas, on December 11 to compete for the title of Miss Barbie Venezuela. Adult males primped and preened the classic Barbie dolls by styling their hair and creating custom dresses, then they gave their dolls extensive backgrounds – careers, educations, philanthropic work, etc. – and shared them with the audience as if they were actually beauty pageant contestants. And can you believe it, not once did they make their Barbie dolls have sex with a Stretch Armstrong.

The winner of this year’s Venezuela title was someone who does not deserve the effort of a Google search, and he can proudly go on to compete at the 2011 Miss Barbie Universe pageant, which will take place in the 7th circle of hell.

Anyway, video of the Miss Barbie Venezuela pageant surfaced over the weekend, and if you think your life sucks, well, don‘t go dropping a toaster in your bubble bath just yet. There she is, Miss Barbie Venezuela, after the jump…

(Banner pic sans El Perro de Langosta via MSNBC, with a few other photos for your viewing terror.)

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