09.17.07 11 years ago 28 Comments

Lions QB Jon Kitna — the Touchdown Assassin who predicted ten wins for Detroit before the season began — has been making good on his promise so far in leading his team to a 2-0 start.  But Kitna must have made a pact with God, because the Big Guy Upstairs is now healing Kitna's brain contusions when He's not sending famines to countries who worship the wrong god.  Witness:

Kitna was knocked out of the game against Minnesota on Sunday with a concussion, only to return and lead the Lions to an overtime win over the Vikings.

"I've never felt anything like that, and for it to clear up and go right back to as normal as I can be, is nothing short of a miracle," Kitna said Monday. "I just definitely feel the hand of God. That's all it was. You can't explain it. "I have no headaches, no symptoms, no lingering effects. But that was the worst my head has ever felt, and the worse my memory was in the second quarter. Yet, after halftime there was nothing."

With Leather supports this theory and echoes Kitna in his heavenly praise.  Considering Kitna beat the Vikings, perhaps Someone didn't like us naming Adrian Peterson Purple Jesus?

(Thanks to Craig) 

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