07.28.08 10 years ago 15 Comments

Nigerian soccer coach Siasia has demanded that his players cut their hair before the Olympic tournament begins. 

Siasia, known as a stickler for discipline, believes that his players are devoting too much time to their elaborate hairstyles, time which he believes could be better used in fine-tuning their performances.  And the coach goes as far as to claim that players with short hair are more aerodynamic and so find it easier to find their rhythm on the pitch.

Grooming standards are important for any team with lofty aspirations.  It really is true: players with short hair get around easier and are better at establishing the rhythm method.  That's why I shave my junk.

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