We Bought A Million Bucks Worth Of Powerball Tickets On This Simulator And Lost Big


The Powerball Lottery drawing is at $800 million. When the chance at eternal glory in the form of a sudden cash injection that would make Donald Trump your friend materializes in the universe, it gets people talking. If you visit your water cooler, your co-workers are probably thinking about a life in which $800 million (or about $496 million in lump sum cash) changes everything. No more student debt. No more bills. No more one bedroom apartment… Just an underground fortress filled with hundreds, NO, thousands of corgis and Oculus Rifts.

Or maybe thousands of corgis wearing Oculus Rifts.

But, you’re not going to win. The odds of winning the Powerball jackpot are 1 in 292,201,338. Even if you and your office buddies split the cost and buy a potpourri of Powerball tickets thus increasing your meager chances just a little more than the next guy – you aren’t going to win. (And if you’re reading this and you do win, then you have to give me four million dollars just so you can rub it in my face.)

But that’s not going to happen because you. won’t. win. The LA Times proved it with this soul-crushing Powerball simulator:

Screen Shot 2016-01-08 at 5.21.20 PM

I spent well over two grand going for that perfect jackpot ticket (with my traditional numbers) and only got $183 back. No normal person could afford to do this. Which led to me wonder if someone like Trump, or Martin Shkreli should gamble some of their money on the Powerball. So I virtually slapped down a million bucks on lottery tix to see what would happen.

To simulate buying that many tickets, the program took almost two hours. Over a million dollars spent on these Powerball tickets and all we got back was a measly 89 grand.

This will never be you:

scrooge money

Try the simulator here, then share the good news with all your friends!

(Via LA Times)