It’s hard to believe, but John Cena made his main roster debut for WWE nearly fourteen years ago in June of 2002. Ever since, Cena has been one of the top stars in the wacky world of professional wrestling, and no matter your opinions on him as a performer, there’s no denying that the future WWE Hall of Famer has provided us with more than his fair share of memorable moments.
We’ve already covered the 11 facts you need to know about Cena’s early career, but with the Dr. of Thuganomics getting ready to celebrate his 39th birthday on Saturday, let’s take a look back at all 39 of Cena’s best moments from both in and out of the ring.
The debut
No retrospective on John Cena is complete without his Smackdown debut against Kurt Angle. The “rookie with ruthless aggression” (and bike shorts that either match or contrast with your local sports team’s colors, depending on alignment) put up a good fight, almost won, and got a handshake from The Undertaker for his troubles. Not a bad start.
Unexpected John Cena takes the internet by storm
For a brief moment in 2015, the Unexpected John Cena meme was everywhere. The meme originated from a hilarious prank call made by a DJ at a radio station that’s been around on the internet for quite a while. I remember first hearing back in high school, so we’re talking the 2008-09 range here.
Despite being around for a while, the video of the prank didn’t really take off until last year, but once the hilarious “IT’S JOHN CENA!!” voiceovers starting popping up, they didn’t stop.
Like Michael Jordan, John Cena’s years and years of contributions to his sport have now been overshadowed to a large portion of the population by an internet meme that just happens to have his face on it. The world is a cruel place.
The Royal Rumble return
“John Cena returns from injury faster than expected” has become a running joke at this point, but the greatest example of it happening is still the 2008 Royal Rumble. Cena showing up as a surprise #30 entrant was goosebumps-worthy, and his “yes, I’m John Cena” pose is still pretty iconic.
The followup wasn’t as great. Cena won the Rumble, last eliminating Triple H, then moved on to WrestleMania to face WWE Champion Randy Orton and … uh, Triple H in a triple threat. Orton won. But hey, that return was dope.
Cena and Amy Schumer’s Trainwreck sex scene
John Cena has been dabbling in the acting world on the side now for quite some time, but he didn’t receive his first big breakout role until he scored the part of Amy Schumer’s over sensitive boyfriend in the 2015 hit, Trainwreck.
The role was hilarious, and Cena was surprisingly perfect for it. Being as it was an Amy Schumer movie, there was unsurprisingly some raunchy sex scenes involved. WWE may not have been thrilled to see their no. 1 attraction to children making his best “Oh” face on camera and being completely in the buff, but you have to at least give the man some credit for laying it all out there. The part also led to the former WWE Champion scoring roles in Sisters and Daddy’s Home as well, so even if his girlfriend Nikki Bella wasn’t thrilled about it, it seemed to all work out for him.
A very fortunate Halloween costume
Ever wondered how Cena transitioned from a rookie in short pants to the “Doctor of Thuganomics?” It was all thanks to a very fortunate Halloween costume during a 2002 edition of Smackdown.
Cena dressed as Vanilla Ice and spent the entire party rapping. The Billy Kidman Phantom of the Opera didn’t like it, but it was our first true look at Cena’s personality. For better or worse, that personality is what took him from being a slightly more enthusiastic Mark Jindrak to one of the most important and profitable superstars of all time.
Cena grants his 500th Make-A-Wish
Some WWE fans have been clamoring for ages for the leader of Ruthless Aggression to turn heel, but there’s a pretty simple reason why that won’t ever happen: little kids absolutely love him.
Cena is so popular that sick children who participate in the Make-A-Wish foundation have requested to meet their favorite WWE superstar more than anyone else, and he is more than willing to oblige, granting over 500 Make-A-Wishes in his career. John Cena the performer may have his hits and misses, but John Cena, the guy, is the absolute best.
The WrestleMania debut
Cena made his first WrestleMania appearance count; he delivered an Attitude Adjustment to the Big Show and won the United States Championship. Over a decade later, he’d win the U.S. title again and give it a relevancy it had arguably never seen before.
A year after his WrestleMania XX debut, Cena upped the stakes:
The WrestleMania WWE Championship win
At WrestleMania 21 — the numbering gets weird on these, sorry for jumping back and forth from Roman numerals — the WWE guard officially changed. Batista defeated Triple H in the main event to win the World Heavyweight Championship, and John Cena defeated JBL to become the new WWE Champion. It had to be a great match to follow Big Show vs. Akebono, right?
If you’re reading this on Cena’s birthday in 2016, he’s gotten 15 of these championship runs now. If you’re reading this on Cena’s birthday in 2017, yes, John Cena is a 22 time World Champion.
WRESTLEMANIA ENTRANCE LIGHTNING ROUND!
WrestleMania 22 Gangsters
Ever wanted to see CM Punk come to the ring with a gun? Here’s your chance. Cena’s first dramatic WrestleMania entrance happened in Chicago at WrestleMania 22, and featured one of his future blood rivals (more on that later) as an entrance extra. Be careful out there, Triple H.
WrestleMania 23 Car
You know which streets are totally empty? The streets outside of an arena during WrestleMania. No cars, nobody walking around, nothing. It’s a stunt driving paradise. But seriously, who left a pane of glass right there?
WrestleMania XXIV Marching Band
For my money, the most underrated WrestleMania entrance ever. Cena gets a marching band to play him down to the ring, and it’s the right kind of dorky cool to accentuate Cena’s strengths without asking him to fire a prop gun or drive through things. Those were cool, too, but this one’s the best.
WrestleMania 25 Clone Army
Begun, the clone war has.
WrestleMania XXVI Drill Team
This list is a celebration of Cena’s best moments, but shoutout to him for being divisive enough to make WWE fans boo things that are objectively wonderful. At WrestleMania 26, Cena entered with the U.S. Air Force Honor Guard drill team. It’s great, and the crowd is just booing at a hum level the entire time. How could they possibly top that?
WrestleMania XXVII Gospel Choir
https://dailymotion.com/video/xhykrh
BY BOOING A GOSPEL CHOIR.
The main event of WrestleMania XXVII is a garbage fire, but the entrances are fantastic. Miz gets a great Ozymandias-style intro set to ‘Hate Me Now,’ and Cena gets the world’s most melodramatic DMX-narrated tribute video about how important he is to children followed by a gospel choir. I can’t capitalize or italicize that enough. The crowd boos it, because John Cena. Since 27, Cena’s WrestleMania entrances have been pretty straight-forward.
Note: Cena’s logo looking a little too much like the Confederate flag does hurt what they’re going for, gotta say.
All of John Cena’s Today Show appearances
John Cena has been a regular guest on NBC’s The Today Show over the years, and he’s provided some of his best non-wrestling moments on the show. There was the time Cena surprised a son of a Charleston shooting victim, the time he explained smarky wrestling booing to Kathie Lee and Hoda, the time he danced to Salt N’ Pepa, the time he did some weird segment about Christmas decoration storage hacks, the time he played with baby animals and about a thousand more.
If only Kathie Lee and Hoda’s appearance on his television show went as smoothly.
Cena’s “Bad Bad Man” A-Team parody
Back in 2005, John Cena was still trying to promote his music career (more on that later) and released a music video to promote his song “Bad Bad Man.” The song is enough to dissect on its own, but the video, which parodies the A-Team, features Cena shooting a flamethrower and also involves the late great Gary Coleman, is even crazier than you think it is.
Cena guest stars on the Johnny Karate Super Awesome Musical Explosion Show
During the last season of Parks and Rec, Chris Pratt’s Andy Dwyer was able to turn his character of Johnny Karate into a local television star where he helped teach children important daily lessons like to learn something, make something, try something new, be nice to someone, and ninja attack mailman Gary.
Johnny Karate also got some help from none other than The Franchise himself “Martial Arts Superstar” John Cena, only for Cena to get arrested for stealing Johnny’s guitar and sentenced to the dunk tank where he is nearly bitten to death by a tarantula.
Cena gets totally ignored by a NASCAR reporter
One would think that the crossover appeal among WWE fans and NASCAR fans would be pretty substantial, so when John Cena showed up on pace car duty for the 2016 Daytona 500, one would assume that a Fox Sports reporter would at the very least stop and acknowledge the WWE star’s presence.
Fortunately for the sake of lolz, that was not the case, as Cena had an incredulous look on his face after the reporter brushed him aside and snapped her hair in his face.
Ironically that’s the exact same face I had when I saw that John Cena vs. John Laurinaitis was main eventing Over the Limit 2012 over CM Punk vs. Daniel Bryan. Never forget.
The Judgment Day bloodbath
John Cena can bleed. We don’t think about it much, but in a different era, he’d be in a crimson mask on the cover of every wrestling magazine at your local convenience store.
The best evidence of this is the I Quit match against JBL from Judgment Day 2005. Cena takes bleeding to a whole new level here, and the finish is great; JBL is simply too afraid of what a bloody, violent Cena’s going to do to him next that he preemptively gives up. It established Cena as a champion who would do anything to keep his title, and reminded us that as good as he could occasionally be, JBL didn’t have the same kind of heart. Great stuff. Also, so much blood.
You-Manga
Cena had some good matches early in his career, but he didn’t have a truly great one until the Last Man Standing match with Umaga at the 2007 Royal Rumble. This one still holds up today as one of Cena’s best matches ever, and certainly the best that didn’t involve him trading holds with a popular fan favorite for 20 minutes. It’s the perfect realization of the “Hulk Hogan vs. evil foreign monster” trope, brought into a new decade.
The image of a bloody Cena having to dismantle basically the entire ringside area just to choke Umaga into unconsciousness for a few seconds is incredible. If you haven’t seen this one, check out the full match on the Network. You’ll like it more than you’re expecting. Umaga was the truth.
Cena calls out Donald Trump
Some athletes who are the face of their particular sport are afraid to take any kind of political stance for fear of it alienating at least part of their fan base, but not John Cena.
On one of his Today Show appearances last December, Cena spoke out against Donald Trump’s anti-Muslim rhetoric and he did not mince words, saying:
“The last time we did anything like this was in World War II, and that was one of the more reprehensible acts by the United States of America. ‘We are the melting pot, except for you.’ That does not go along with our DNA. Trump is being trumped, there’s no other way to say it.”
Muhammad Hassan would be proud.
Cena ethers The Rock
The Rock is a popular guy, so it’s hard to find people who’d admit that John Cena occasionally dragged him in their WrestleMania promo battles. That said, the one indisputable Flawless Victory for Cena came in 2012 when The Rock got called out for not being able to memorize what he was planning to say on TV.
Jump to the 18:00 mark in the video.
“I don’t need words like respect and loyalty to trend worldwide, just like I don’t need my notes for my promo on my wrist. Nice tattoo.”
Cena spends seven delightfully weird minutes in Heaven with Mike O’Brien
Mike O’Brien is in the same boat as Kyle Mooney as someone who is way too hilarious to waste their talents on SNL, so he’s been off doing other things since leaving the show in 2015 (although they do still occasionally give him the 12:50 slot to do one of his delightfully weird shorts).
One of his projects has been his web series “7 Minutes in Heaven” and Cena was nice enough to play along as one of his firsts guests. During the gloriously awkward interview segment, they try on some ridiculous looking hats, discuss the unique smell of Big Show, and O’Brien straight up kisses him on the mouth.
Say what you will about John Cena, but there is no other WWE superstar who would have been able to play off of O’Brien’s weirdness as well as he did.
Cena defends pro wrestling in a hilarious Foot Locker commercial
John Cena has done his fair share of commercials in his day, but there is none better than his wonderful spot for Foot Locker in late 2014. In the ad, Cena explains to a few bros that you don’t have to believe something is real to enjoy it, as it’s all about the suspension of disbelief and, if it makes you happy, that’s all that matters.
It’s a conversation every wrestling fan has had at least once with the “Wrestling is fake tho lol” crowd, so hearing the biggest star in wrestling explain what we’ve been saying all along was a pretty great feeling.
“You Can’t See Me” the album
Eleven years later and it’s still ridiculous that John Cena, a white pro wrestler from Massachusetts, actually made a for-real hip-hop album because Stephanie McMahon liked the freestyle she heard from him once backstage. It’s like if your Facebook friend from high school who has been saying they’re going to be a rapper since they graduated actually released an album.
Our own Austin Heiberg took an in-depth look at each track when he reviewed the album last year and I highly recommend reading it if you need a refresher on dope tracks such as “Chain Gang Is the Click,” “Don’t F*ck with Us,” and “Know the Rep.”
It’s either the best or worst thing John Cena is ever done, depending on how you choose to look at it.
Rap battling Kurt Angle
The stuff of legend. Kurt’s sideways hat and Carlton dancing. Brian Hebner being way too great at beatboxing. Microphone blowjob pantomimes. Everything you’d want from Kurt Angle and John Cena having human history’s whitest rap battle. Ten years later and I’m still mad they didn’t sell those Team Angle warmup suits.
Cena wows the cast of SportsNation by speaking fluent Mandarin
Between wrestling four or five times a week, his Total Divas responsibility, his talk show appearances, his music career, and his movie stardom, I’m not sure how John Cena ever had the time to learn how to speak fluent Mandarin, but it’s one of his many hidden talents.
Recently Cena stopped by the set of ESPN’s SportsNation and randomly broke out the Mandarin much to the surprise of hosts Michelle Beadle, Max Kellerman, and Marcellus Wiley. As we know from his feud with Kevin Owens, Cena also knows French, because what can’t this guy do.
Cena and Nikki Bella are the best at Halloween costumes
It’s hard to tell sometimes because of the manufactured drama of Total Divas, but Cena and Nikki Bella can be a pretty adorable couple sometimes. Take their dope Halloween costumes, for example.
Two years ago, Cena and Bella channelled their inner Will Farrell and Christina Applegate as they went as Ron Burgundy and Tits McGee, and this past year, the pair nailed their Dumb and Dumber themed outfits.
Somehow that orange suit is still less offensive looking than half the t-shirts Cena has worn during his career.
The Great Khali sings happy birthday to John Cena
In perhaps the greatest moment in his entire career, The Great Khali once sang “Happy Birthday” to John Cena in front of tens of thousands of people.
There isn’t much else that I can say about it, really. If The Great Khali attempting to sing “Happy Birthday,” in English no less, doesn’t do it for you, nothing will.
Cena recalls the time he ate dog food ice cream because he was bored at work
Believe it or not, John Cena hasn’t always been a pro wrestler. In fact, he was once a bored high school student who did stupid things at his summer job, just like the rest of us.
In “My Worst Summer Job” a segment for The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon, Cena explained that while working at an ice cream stand for his Aunt may not be the worst job out there, it was pretty boring. That boredom apparently led to Cena and his co-workers to entertaining themselves by coming up with the weirdest flavors to mix with vanilla in the frozen yogurt machine.
Cena admitted that the boredom led him to trying out Chef Boyardee ice cream, which actually sounds intriguing, but he probably took it a step too far when he mixed in milk-bone dog treats with his cousin Mark.
Having once been paid handsomely to eat dog food during my youth, I can confirm that it is definitely not worth it and you are missing absolutely nothing by not trying it out.
Cena admits he’s just like us after all and wishes WWE wasn’t PG
For better of for worse, there is no WWE superstar who embodies the “PG Era” more than John Cena. He has become synonymous during his career for pandering to the younger fans and often cutting promos with childish insults that only pop those in the crowd under the age of 10.
Well, as you may have suspected, that’s not entirely coming from Cena himself (in fact, it might be none of it). In an interview this week with Rolling Stone, Cena admitted that he wished the company would bring back blood (no one had more intense blade jobs than Cena in ’05-’06 before it got banned) and that he has to stick within the confines of PG even though he secretly hates it.
“I’m a 38-year-old man. I’d much rather it be a program geared toward me, whether that’s TV-14 or sometimes even more graphic than that, which is what I like. For one thing, profanity brought fire out of people with personalities that backed the language. It’s very difficult to say, ‘Oh, you’re being poopy,’ especially when they’re meant to be fighting words. And now, if someone starts to bleed, the referee intervenes to stop the bleeding. But before, you’d just let it fly. Blood is one of the things that made fights cool. Like, you knew it had gotten serious. I understand why we don’t do it anymore. Vince has been a coach to me, a father figure, a boss and a friend, and his goal and my goal are the same: to make the company be as big as it can be. But, yeah, the blood is one thing I miss.”
All of that is to say, don’t blame Cena the next time he makes an innuendo about someone’s testicle size, because that’s about as edgy of a thing that he is allowed to do.
That time Cena wore actual wrestling gear for the first time in a decade to impress Nikki Bella
John Cena’s ring gear throughout the years has been pretty consistent: jorts and sneakers. Sure, Cena comes to the ring with his colorful hats and t-shirts, but when it’s time to get down to business, the 15-time world champ has stuck with the unconventional gear ever since the Word Life days.
At this point, it’s jarring to see Cena in any other kind of gear, but he did prove that he has at least one “normal” wrestling outfit in his closet on a season three episode of Total Divas when he broke out a red and yellow singlet and a Mr. America looking mask to boot.
Cena looks like he’d fit right in on Lucha Underground season three. Let’s call him Agresión Despiadada Jr.
Daniel Bryan
I considered just having this entry read, “Daniel Bryan.”
Interestingly, many of Cena’s best matches are the ones he loses. That says something profound about his character. We’re so used to him winning (and HOW he wins, which too often feels false) that when he loses, it feels strange. It feels important, like we’ve turned some kind of corner. It’s a melodramatic response from fans, sure, but after over a decade of the man popping up and hitting his finish out of nowhere, you get trained to expect certain things.
In our brains, Cena has three important recent losses. This one, to Daniel Bryan at SummerSlam 2013, is one of the best. We tend to take Cena for granted as a performer because he does a specific thing that works (and sells shirts) (and makes everybody a ton of money), so matches like this remind us that he CAN do that other stuff, he’s just gotta be a certain thing to be the face of everything.
Try not to watch the clip long enough to get to the part where Bryan gets the rugged pulled out from under him.
Money in the Bank 2011
A masterpiece. The best of Cena’s important “change is coming” losses was Money in the Bank 2011’s to CM Punk. Cena was the catalyst for the passionate promos and matches that gave us the “Summer of Punk,” and while (like a lot of things in wrestling) it went to some decidedly JOHN CENA places, a lot of the work is still incredible. The match is one of the best WWE Championship matches ever, but it’s also worth revisiting the Punk/Cena promo from before Night of Champions 2012 where John brings the story back around full circle and lands some shockingly accurate Real Talk on Punk.
Suplex City
Not to dwell on these Cena losses, but they’re REALLY GOOD.
Brock Lesnar and John Cena have two important, quality WWE matches: their clash at Extreme Rules 2012 after Lesnar’s return (which Cena won, due to Brock not being 100% yet or … something) and their championship match at SummerSlam 2014, featuring ALL THE SUPLEXES EVER. Cena gets taken to the f*cking woodshed and it’s still shocking to watch a year and a half later. It’s one of the only times Cena’s ever been truly, violently beaten, and Cena’s work in the decade around it is what makes it resonate so well.
All the times Cena has appeared in a ridiculous WWE animated movie
Since WWE rebranded themselves to gear more towards children, they’ve also tried their hand at making several straight-to-DVD movies of once famous TV show or film franchises, and John Cena has appeared in basically every single one of them.
There was the ridiculously named WWE and The Flintstones: Stone Aged SmackDown, Scooby-Doo: WrestleMania Mystery, as well as the upcoming sequel, and let’s not forget about Surf’s Up 2 which now involves wrestlers for some reason. There was also the short-lived WWE Network series WWE Slam City in which Cena portrayed an auto mechanic because he knows how to use a jack, Jack.
Cena tries to sell you on his very own miracle diet program
Back in 2014, John Cena became a sponsor for the Body Change weight loss system where he promised you, YEAH YOU, RIGHT THERE ON THE COUCH EATING POTATO CHIPS! could change your entire body to look like a WWE superstar in only 10 weeks. All while getting to eat whatever food you wanted….for one day a week, and a bunch of food selected for you on the other six days.
If you’re feeling a little suspicious, don’t fret, because THE CHAMP IS HERE! with his very own cooking show! Or at least he was, but that YouTube channel has since been deleted. Alas, only a select few got to see John Cena take seven minutes to teach us how to make a ham and avocado platter with his giant hands and arms, but I have faith that one day that video will emerge again on the interweb.
The U.S. Open Challenge
John Cena took a secondary championship and not only gave it worth for the first time in ages, he gave himself a new reputation. The talking point went from “John Cena has had more good matches than you’re remembering, but yeah he sucks a lot” to “JOHN CENA IS OBVIOUSLY AWESOME.” He’s still divisive-ass John Cena, but after his run with the U.S. Championship, it’s a little clearer what a somehow underrated in-ring performer he is.
He had good-to-great matches with everyone from Neville and Sami Zayn to Cesaro and Dean Ambrose. Now whenever someone has the United States Championship, we’re all thinking, “when can Cena get that belt back?”
Cena interrupts a match to acknowledge a marriage proposal in the crowd
John Cena is a man of romance, and he was not about to let a pesky little United States championship match with Dolph Ziggler stop him from giving a newly engaged couple their due during a 2015 episode of Raw. Cena, apparently not the least bit concerned with Ziggler’s presence, stopped mid-match to engage the fans in a “YES” and acknowledge the happy couple even though the guy was sporting a Seth Rollins shirt.
Joking aside, this is one of those “John Cena is actually awesome at his job” moments. Like, a ton of less experienced wrestlers probably would have been completely thrown off by something like that, but not only does Cena call an audible mid-match to give the happy couple a special moment, he also let the crowd get it out of their system before they could turn their attention back to the match in the ring.
This would be a good example of going off-script, while a bad one would be, say, The Rock spending 10 minutes talking to annoying cosplayers.
