This rat has finally answered the question of how Splinter fed all those baby turtles:
Some thoughts on this video:
A) For being food-destroying, disease-spreading, toilet-invading vermin, rats can be pretty damn adorable.
B) Even the trash pizza in New York looks pretty tasty.
C) Was anyone else humming Templeton’s theme song from Charlotte’s Web when they watched that video?
D) Perhaps we have finally found the common ground to end mankind’s extended, and devastating war with rats.
Rats may have been falsely accused of starting the black plague, but they still have caused untold death, destruction, and deeply embarrassing arm flailing and little-girl-screaming by humans for millennia. But with the discovery of this video, we know that rats love pizza — delicious, universally adored, occasionally stupid, pizza — just as much as we do.
Will appropriating our national pizza reserves to the rat armies end this conflict? There is no way to know for sure, but with millions of aggressive, pizza-fueled rats living in New York City alone, we need peace now more than ever. Because if the following video is any indication, rats have officially replaced the cat on the food chain:
So let’s share a slice, before humanity is next.
