Around this time every year, all the glossy magazines in your local supermarket start saying the exact same thing: Your sex life sucks! Your sex life is boring! And unless you’re putting a donut around your significant other’s ding-dong, your sex life is WRONG! Sad and wrong! The worst.
Does that kill you a little inside? That’s cool, because it’s meant to. How else are you going to sell magazines if you’re not going after people’s weaknesses? You’ve got to promise them that a sex life straight out of 50 Shades isn’t just possible but mandatory in today’s society. And if you’ve ever spent the $3.95 (or however much an issues of Men’s Health costs these days) and found yourself disappointed, it’s because none of the advice, right down to the nebulous command that you “communicate,” is ever fully explained.
That’s why we spoke to Vanessa Marin, a Berlin-based clinician who specializes in helping people have the sex lives they’ve always dreamed of. So breathe a sigh of relief, if you’re trying to get your groove on in the best way possible this year, you won’t need to visit your local donut shop. All you need is open communication — we promise we’ll explain that! — and some realistic expectations.