Top Chef Power Rankings, Week 9: A Double Elimination

Senior Editor
02.02.18 30 Comments

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This week on Top Chef, Tom Colicchio was very disappointed in everyone. In fact, the most shocking part of the show was that Tom didn’t just walk off the set forever at the end, muttering about how “I could get better nachos at a Barstow truck stop.”

You chefs, you really blew it this week. Seriously, the actives say they might ding your entire pledge class.

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(I call this face “Tom Ennuichio”)

Not only that, there were two eliminations this week, and it’s become abundantly clear, just due to simple math, that at least one chef that I’ve listed as a favorite all season long isn’t going to make the finale. Does that mean that I regret my choice of favorites? That my rankings are worthless? That I should admit that I’ve been wrong all along?

Nay, I decline. I believe, Donald Rumseld-like, that I was simply making the best choice based on the information I had to go on at the time. (I am not owned! I am not owned…)

The week opened with a bombshell, dropped by Padma (stop this bombshell on bombshell violence!): that this week’s quickfire would not only not come with the prize of immunity, but the loser would go home. And for what mega-important challenge would failure warrant the punishment of sudden death??? Why, cooking with edible flowers, of course.

Hmm, curious choice, that. I’ll be honest, when I think of a challenge that will test chefs on the skills necessary for chef success, “cook me up a plate of daffodils” isn’t the first thing that comes to mind. (“…And don’t overcook the stamens!”)

Nonetheless, the show went on. Favorites were laid low, lovable fat guys got kicked off. After that it was time for the elimination challenge — a Super Bowl tailgate! — which, thanks to the magic of television, was actually filmed months ago (presumably back when the guest-judging Denver Broncos still had a realistic shot at making the playoffs). Prior to their eight-game losing streak between October and December, I’m guessing.

Those guest judges included “placekicker/food blogger” Brandon McManus, who seemed to have his job as guest judge stolen out from under him by cornerback Bradley Roby, who kept putting up great disses and setting up Tom for football puns. Here’s Roby setting Tom up for “I think this mac and cheese ran the wrong route.”

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I’m really enjoying the “dad pun, smirk” combo Tom has been throwing all season. Anyway, great job judging out there, Roby! (*appreciative hetero ass pat*)

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