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Belize Is Offering Free Trips To Some Nevada Residents Fleeing The ‘Area 51 Raid’


Belize Tourism Board

If you are, for some reason, one of the over two million humans currently planning on attending the ill-advised raid on Area 51 on September 20th, please think twice before storming a U.S. military base. Because can’t confidently say you won’t find aliens or evidence of alien activity, but we can confidently say that you’ll find a very irritated U.S. military. While we realize that a Facebook RSVP holds very little weight in the real world, two million is still a heck of a lot of people. Meaning even if an eighth of the people who RSVP show up, we’re still looking at 250,000 hyped conspiracy theorists.

Seems worrisome. Right?

One of the many reasons this is a bad idea is that the nearest town — Rachel, Nevada — has a population of 54, no gas station, and a single 10-room hotel. Meaning the locals of the small rural town are understandably freaked out over the potential influx of people. But if you’re one of the 54 residents of Rachel, fear not — the Belize Tourism Board is offering a temporary refuge in Belize for 10 residents of Rachel.

Belize Tourism Board

The free retreat includes airfare and hotel accommodations in Belize from September 19th through the 21st, offering you the perfect window of time to avoid a stampede of idiots about to invade your town after the U.S. military turns them away.

To enter the sweepstakes, Rachel, Nevada residents 18 or older must send an email to rachelnevadaretreat@gmail.com, and provide proof of legal residence by 11:59 p.m. CDT on Thursday, August, 8th. On August 9th 10 winners will be chosen at random and will be given their full itineraries by August 11th.

If you live in Rachel, the odds of winning are just too high to pass this up! Especially because Belize is flat out amazing.

Belize Tourism Board

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