Ever wondered which are the most- and least-drunk cities in America? We’ve got the top 20 of each category for you, and you might be surprised where they are. (Admission: You probably won’t be too surprised where they are.)
Earlier this week, 24/7 Wall Street released the results of their investigation into which cities are the drunkest and most sober in America. Using county-level health data, they figured out which cities had the highest percentage of residents who admitted to regular binge or heavy drinking, then ranked them. They also determined the medium household income of each ranked city, as well as the premature death rate, and percentage of driving deaths involving alcohol (Whoa, slow down with the buzzkill corollaries, heath organization).
It turns out the drunkest cities are mostly in the Midwest. Eleven of them are all in one state: Wisconsin. To be fair, though, if we had to deal with Scott Walker being in charge of our state, we’d drink to excess, too. (State politics humor for the win!)
Here’s the full list:
20. Corvallis, Ore.
19. Iowa City, Iowa
18. Lincoln, Neb.
17. Milwaukee, Wis.
16. Janesville-Beloit, Wis.
15. Racine, Wis.
14. Grand Forks, N.D.
13. Missoula, Mont.
12. Sheboygan, Wis.
11. Wausau, Wis.
10. Mankato-North Mankato, Minn.
9. Eau Claire, Wis.
8. Ames, Iowa
7. Fond du Lac, Wis.
6. La Crosse-Onalaska, Wis.
5. Fargo, N.D.
4. Madison, Wis.
3. Green Bay, Wis.
2. Oshkosh-Neenah, Wis.
1. Appleton, Wis.
You know what they say, “Nothing salves the pain of routinely dealing with negative-45-degree temperatures quite like getting piss-drunk and projectile-vomiting America’s finest sharp cheddar onto a partially-thawed defensive lineman.”
Even less surprising is the list of the driest cities in America. Take a wild guess which state has four of the top five:
20. Anniston-Oxford-Jacksonville, Ala.
19. Gadsden, Ala.
18. Kingsport-Bristol, Tenn.
17. Farmington, N.M.
16. Rocky Mount, N.C.
15. Knoxville, Tenn.
14. Huntington-Ashland, W.Va.
13. Cleveland, Tenn.
12. Memphis, Tenn.
11. Owensborough, Ky.
10. Charleston, W.Va.
9. Johnson City, Tenn.
8. Jackson, Tenn.
7. Morristown, Tenn.
6. Parkersburg-Vienna, W.Va.
5. Ogden-Clearfield, Utah
4. Logan, Utah
3. Beckley, W.Va.
2. St. George, Utah
1. Provo-Orem, Utah
WHO COULD’VE PREDICTED UTAH?! (Everyone. The answer is everyone.)
Other over-represented states like Tennessee and West Virginia aren’t much of a surprise, either, as it’s not just Mormons who teetotal — there are a surprising number of evangelical religious attitudes against the consumption of alcohol too. We know this thanks to Uproxx’s very own Jennifer C. Martin who, as it happens, originally hails from Cleveland, TN, the No. 13 entry on the driest cities list. Poor Jennifer; no wonder she drinks (responsibly) so much now.
(Via 24/7 Wall Street)
