In less than a month, you and your friends (perhaps a cousin, too?) will be at your local county fair, eating turkey legs as big as a newborn baby and facing the difficult decision of whether you should ride the ring of death — real name: Ring of Fire, but considering how rickety it looks, death does just as well — or leave it for another day, one during which you hadn’t eaten your fill of fried foods.
“It’s just so early in the season,” you’ll say, “my stomach isn’t ready.”
If anyone knows your struggle, it’s Burger King, and they’ve taken a drastic (and wonderful, depending on who you ask) (not your doctor; never your doctor) step to getting you ready for #FairSeason2017 by bringing back their most American offering ever. Take your heart medication and say a silent prayer to St. John (patron saint of heart disease patients as well as printers and booksellers) (he wears a lot of hats) because Mac N’ Cheetos are back and more deep-fried than ever.
According to Mashable, these delightful little deep-fried puffs — referred to by Burger King as triple-threats because they can sing, act, and dance — will arrive on May 18th and be available for a very limited time (five pieces will run you $2.69). And if last year’s almost immediate sell-out was any indication, you’d better get down to Burger King quick, lest you be stuck making these on your own at home and worrying about portion control. Who wants any of that? Not you. You’ve got deep fried Cheetos to eat and an entire summer of gorging to prepare for.