Facebook Is Stephan El Shaarawy’s Heaux Search Engine

09.05.12 5 years ago

Soccer stars sure have a way with words unlike other professional athletes. Take AC Milan’s young star Stephan El Shaarawy for example. Goal.com took some snippets from French mag Max about how Zlatan Ibrahimovic used to scream on him for not feeding his ego passing him the ball. Then Sharwaay said Gattuso derided Sharwaay’s finely tweeded eyebrows: mistaking self-maintenance for lack of concentration on his play. Those footballers surely are an image conscious lot.

Somehow the conversation shifted to Stephan’s prolific smangin exploits: a life he’s ’bout and candidly shared with readers.

“The former Genoa man also went on to explain about his love life, saying: “The moment I got to Serie A, my sex life multiplied by 10. I use Facebook to pick up all my women. You find so much stuff on the internet.”

Here I stood thinking the Facebook game wrapped up when they introduced news feeds. Looks like I’ve been doing it wrong since ’06. I like how he qualifies his statement with “You find so much stuff on the internet” like FB broads are an e-resource akin to mp3’s found on Google. I read things like this and it just reinforces the “life ain’t fair” mantra too well. It’s times like this where regular joes like us wish we were 19-year-old, internationally known forwards with ridiculous haircuts.

However, if you catch your girl checking his profile, I trust you’ll know what to do. If not, I’ll just leave a big clue and mozy on out.

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