After Three Years Of Struggle Green Bay Fan Decides He’s Had Enough

01.06.14 4 years ago 86 Comments

Consider the struggles of a Green Bay Packers fan. They had to squeak by the Chicago Bears in Week 17 (and win the NFC North because nobody else would be bothered with such an indignity) and limp into the playoffs 8-7-1, Super Bowl dreams fading.

But hope still lived on in the heart of one fan, wearing his Packers flannel pajamas late in the afternoon while watching the Wild Card game in his fan cave. That is, until the final seconds of the game when the current NFC champion San Francisco 49ers kicked the winning field goal just as the clock hit zero.

Rationality leaves him. He disrobes out of his Packer garb, ignoring the uncomfortable stares of his guests. He rips down the 2011 Super Bowl XLV poster. 2011? Christ, that was two Katy Perry and Bruno Mars albums ago. Osama Bin Laden was alive, then killed, and then a movie was made about his death and was shut out of the Oscars for Best Director and lost Best Picture in that time.  Steve Jobs was working on an iPhone 11. Occupy Wall Street was months away. Japan was still building nuclear reactors. Kate Middleton was still single, and now she has a royal baby. A FUCKING LIFETIME AGO, MAN.

This is why young people are awful. He has no real memory of the 1980s and the ten-year playoff absence Green Bay suffered. 16 playoff appearances in 20 years, Packer fan. You might just want to cool it a bit.

(H/T Stephan Douglas at The Big Lead

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