Better Know A Draft Pick: Tim Tebow

02.23.10 8 years ago 54 Comments

Welcome to another year of Better Know A Draft Pick. Leading up to the draft we’ll profile all the top prospects that are worth knowing.

Everyone knows Tebow performed circumcisions during the off-season, but were you aware that he once delivered a baby during a game?

Name: Tim Tebow
Nickname: The Mohel

Strengths: Intangibles
Weaknesses: Tangibles

Motor: Internal combustion
Old throwing motion: Wild and erratic like premarital sex.
New throwing motion: Mechanical and pleasureless like marital sex.

Mainstream Media Comparison:
Jesus Christ
KSK Comparison: Mark Brunell with a lower completion percentage.

Who Wants Him: Peter King, others who value a winning attitude over an ability to play football at the next level.
Who Will Take Him: An owner who reeks of desperation.

Story ESPN Will Shove Down Your Throat: If I have to pick one I’ll go with Tim Tebow: Promise Keeper.

Immediate Impact:
Good PR for whichever team drafts him.
Down the Road: A new GM for whichever team drafts him.

Totally unnecessary file photos…

Around The Web