Statistics Prove Dan Dierdorf Is The Worst

12.17.13 4 years ago 70 Comments


Fans always gripe about NFL announcers. Possibly because most of them are terrible at their jobs. But seldom do fans have much to back up their complaints beyond claims like “Phil Simms is a cornpone fuckwit” and “I’m pretty sure Jim Nantz uses THE PATRIOT WAY as his dominatrix safe word”.

But now there’s some substantiation to those claims, thanks to the folks over at Sports on Earth. Go read the piece for further explanation on the methodology, but the short version is the author listened to 32 NFL games, which works out to two per each announcing team across the various networks that carry games. He then tabulated all the occurrences of cliches, factual errors, missed plays, nonsense phrases, self-references and off-topic ramblings.

Granted, that’s not a huge sample size and some of the categories are open to subjective valuations, but you know what? I’m willing to accept the findings because they confirm that Dan Dierdorf is easily the worst NFL announcer and the football world will be a better place when he retires at the end of this season.

Further proof that no one likes him:

Go read the rest of the results. One bit of caution: Joe Buck fares better than most people would like.

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